


Friends Are The Family We Choose For Ourselves

by prosfan



Series: Family Matters [2]
Category: Lewis (TV)
Genre: AU, Gen, Not Canon Compliant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-17
Updated: 2015-06-23
Packaged: 2018-04-04 21:50:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 24,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4154244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prosfan/pseuds/prosfan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A simple trip to help Hathaway decorate his new house in Oxford, lands Lewis, James and Sam in danger, yet again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is the sequel to 'Who Says You Can't Choose Your Family' and the second fic in the 'Family Matters' series.

Its three months after Hathaway had been temporarily paralysed by a man who was threatening to kill his son, that Lewis wakes up to a letter on his doorstep.

 

_Robbie,_

_We don't have internet, so I thought I'd write. We're all moved in...we'll we're here and there are boxes all over the bloody place. Sam's in his element, seems to be the only one making any sense out of the chaos. He's decided he wants to be a painter when he gets older._

 

_Anyway, just wanted to give you our address, when the house actually resembles a house, you should come up for dinner or something. I still need to thank you for looking after us for near enough five weeks, and since you're an old fashioned sod and won't accept money, that's the only thing I can think of._

 

_Cheers,_

_James._

 

Lewis laughs as he reads the letter, only James could sound polite while insulting someone. Not that he's really being insulting. Although the daft sod could have just called him, don't need the internet to use a phone. And they both have mobiles, they've been keeping in touch with the bleeding things. Still, at his age, letters are normally bills, pension payments and invitations to funerals. Its nice to get one that doesn't bring bad news.

 

He picks up his mobile, bringing up James' number and presses call, grinning.

 

"Hello?"

"...' _old fashioned sod?'_ James, I'm wounded."

"Haha, hello Robbie, you got my letter then?"

"Yeah, I got it lad, you could have just called you know."

"Never! I wouldn't have been able to call you an old fashioned sod out loud." That facetiousness hasn't changed over all the years that Robbie has known the younger man.

"Idiot. How's the decorating going?"

"Enthusiastically, but slowly. Bless Sam, he means well but..."

"He's painting pictures on the wall?"

"Yeah pretty much." Lewis laughs, the mental picture that conjures up is adorable.

"Do you need a hand mate?"

"I couldn't ask..."

"James," Lewis sighs. "I just offered right. Anyway, I like DIY. I used to work in my uncle's decorating company when I first left school."

"You mean, you weren't born a copper?" The wondrous tone is clearly designed to be cheeky.

"If I was there lad, I'd cuff you round the back of the head. D'you want me help or not Jim?"

"If its not too much trouble Robbie. On one condition."

"What?" Lewis says warily.

"You stay here so you don't have to drive every night, and you let me cook." Lewis makes 'hmm' noises and then replies.

"Done. Tomorrow ok?"

"Yeah sure. Cheers..." Lewis hears a crash and then the sound of crying.

"James what-" he begins as James cuts in.

"Shit, Sam's just...I told him not to play on the ladder, I've to to go, see you tomorrow?"

"See you tomorrow Jim."

 

Lewis is relieved when he gets text off James five minutes later.

_Panic over, nothing bruised but his pride. Little bugger's already pestering me to go to the park._

Robbie smiles. He's looking forward to tomorrow. While he's talked to them both a few times over the phone in the last three months, he hasn't seen either of them. And of course he's missed James, but he's really missed Sam. In those five weeks that the two Hathaway's stayed with him, he got used to having people around, and more importantly, having a kid around. He replies to James' text and settles on the sofa, planning what he'll need to take to Hathaway's and whether he'll need petrol on the way.

 

******************************************************

 

James is a little nervous the next morning it has to be said. _What was I thinking asking him to stay, when the house is just full of boxes?_ He knows that Lewis isn't going to be bothered, but there's something about it that doesn't sit right with him. Lewis had called that morning to say that he'd be there in the evening, and Hathaway had told him not to eat anything, he was going to cook. There had been no arguments from Lewis and Sam had heard the conversation and become ridiculously excited.

 

Hathaway looks around. There's the sofa, which folds out into a bed. There's a desk and the tv, his laptop sat on it, internet-less as it is. That's about it. He's already decided that Lewis can have his bed, Sam will sleep on is own, and James himself will take the sofa-bed. He won't let Lewis talk him round either, his sofa bed is not made for people over 60 with back problems. Come to think of it, its not made for 40-somethings with knee problems either, but James will manage.

 

"When's Unca Robbie coming?"

"Later on this evening."

"Why not now?"

"Because he has stuff to do."

"Like what?

"I dunno."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why don't you know?"

"I'm not psychic Sammy."

"Should be" the little boy mutters, as he wanders off. James counts to five slowly in his head. Sure enough, on zero, Sam walks back in.

"Daddy?"

"Yes Sam."

"What does 'sycic mean?"

The conversation that follows takes a lot of time, and ends in Sam announcing that James is making it up because if people could read minds, then no one would need to have a bath. Hathaway puzzles over that long after the boy has given up on the conversation, but try as he might, he has no idea what Sam meant.

 

********************************************************

 

At half past six, the doorbell rings and Hathaway carefully puts down the lasagne that he's just about to put in the oven.

He opens the door, and Lewis walks in out of the rain. Robbie grins, seeing his friend again, and Hathaway looks much more healthy than he did three months ago.

"Evening Jim."

"Hello Robbie. Er...you'll have to excuse the state of the place. We've been living out of boxes the last few weeks.

"Ah, no worries man. Where's the bairn?" Before James can answer, the sound of little bare feet slapping against the floor, signals the arrival of the kid in question.

"Unca Robbbbiiiiiiiiieeee" Sam squeals, and Lewis braces himself against the attack, scooping the little boy up. He laughs as Sam starts to wriggle in his grasp, before giving up and wrapping his arms around Robbie's neck.

"Hello kidda. Blimey you've got bigger in a few months."

"I been eating my veggies."

"Aye well, you keep doing that, you might get as tall as your Dad eh?"

"I'm gonna be even taller." He stretches and reaches his hand over Robbie's head to indicate how tall he's going to get.

"I'll do me neck in talking to the both of you."

 

James takes Sam off of Robbie and helps the older man bring his bag inside.

"Lasagne ok?"

"Oh yes, Haven't had a proper lasagne in years."

"Glad to be of service." They walk into the kitchen, so that James can finish preparing the meal. Lewis frowns a little as he watches James walk. But Sam comes rushing over, determined to show Robbie his Lego plane. He sits there listening to Sam as James fixes up the food. The little boy is so excited, that he's fumbling over his words and getting annoyed with himself and although its frustrating the kid, Lewis can't help but think that its adorable.

 

*************************************************************

 

Dinner is lovely, as Lewis expected and James hoped. They turn the TV on and there's an old re run of an some action film on. Sam is getting sleepy and he's lying on the floor, half heartedly rolling a car back and forth. James goes and picks him up. The little boy doesn't protest as he's carried to his room. In ten minutes, James comes back into the room. In eleven minutes Sam follows him in.

"Sam? What's wrong?"

"Didn't say na'night to Unca Robbie." Robbie smiles at him, and James also has a soft smile on his face. Sam staggers over tiredly and climbs up on the sofa, hugging James and Robbie in turn.

"Na'night Unca R'bbie. Na'night Daddy." He mumbles sleepily, before tugging on James' arm.

"You can tuck me in again please Daddy?"

"C'mon then mate."

"Night bonny lad." Robbie calls after them.

 

James comes back in, still smiling softly.

"Spark out as soon as he hit the pillow." He walks half way into the room, and then stops.

"Tea?"

"Thought you'd never ask." James heads into the kitchen, and now Sam is not a distraction, he intends to tackle the subject that had worried him slightly earlier.

"Jim?" James jumps a little, he hadn't heard Robbie follow.

"Robbie?"

"You're still limping." James looks down as if he hadn't noticed, and then nods.

"Yeah, not much though."

"Should be sorted now kidda. What's going on?"

"Nothing. Just, might have...damaged it more than I thought that's all." Lewis sighs. He'd hoped that James would recover from his dislocated knee properly, he'd found it hard to watch the younger man in that much pain.

"How damaged is damaged?" Hathaway shifts uncomfortably.

"Er, Well, its not likely to get much better. It doesn't hurt that much, honestly."

"James, please tell me this isn't because you didn't go to physio or something. And it must hurt, otherwise you wouldn't limp."

"No...No its not, promise. It was just more damaged in the first place than they thought." He sees Lewis' sceptical look. "Look, there's just more damage to the ligaments or tendons or bone or what ever that we thought there was. It's not crippling or anything.. All it means is that I limp a bit every now and then. Could have been a lot worse. Its really not a problem." Robbie frowns.

"Still, must be a pain." James grins a little and reaches to a shelf about the kettle, pulling down two boxes of pills.

"Painkillers Robbie, the wonders of modern medicine."

"Its not a bloody joke James!" Hathaway sighs a little.

"Would it make you feel better if I told you that these aren't painkillers," he says waggling a box labelled 'Prazosin'

"That highly depends what they are for James."

"Nightmares." He puts the box down, talking as he continues to make the tea. "You were right. Chronic Nightmares. Quack put me on these, and some Image Reversal Therapy thing. I think the plan is to take me off the drugs after its all working."

"And is it? Working that is."

"Mostly yeah. Still having a couple of them, but that's normal. And manageable." Robbie's frown softens a little and he leans back against the counter, holding the cup of tea that James has handed him.

"I didn't think that you would actually see someone."

"I didn't have much of a choice really." Lewis raises his eyebrow, and James carries on:

"I woke Sam up every night for a week. He wouldn't sleep in his own room, because my screaming scared him, and then when he slept with me, it woke him up anyway. I couldn't expect him to live like that. He needs sleep. And a Dad that can actually hold himself together, you said that yourself."

"I'm glad that something I said actually sunk in."

"Yeah well, you never let it drop did you? Thanks for doing that by the way."

"No problem"

 

*****************************************************************

 

Not long later, they decide that its best to go to bed. James won't hear anything about Lewis sleeping on the sofa bed.

"Its like you wouldn't accept any money. I'm not inviting you here, whether you're helping decorate or not, and then having you sleep on my back killing sofa. That's out of order." Lewis gives up. When James is being that stubborn, there's really no point arguing with him.

 

He lies in bed, staring at the walls, the wall paper hanging of them in bits and the floor covered in slivers of paper. Smiling he turns on his side to fall asleep. He's actually looking forward to this. Bit of manual labour, Val would laugh if she could see it.

 

And Hathaway seems to be sorting himself out, which is a weight off Robbie's mind. He'd been worried about the younger man, especially after James had phoned him the morning after some of the more vivid nightmares. James hadn't come out and said it, but Lewis had been able to tell that James had been seriously freaked out by something.

 

But Hathaway seems to be making progress, and Sam is clearly full of energy and life and everything that a kid should be.

 

He's smiling as he falls asleep.

 

Downstairs, James sneaks into the kitchen as quietly as he could, grabbing his tablets from where he had left them on the work top. He swallows one with a glass of water, and shudders, before going back to bed and talking himself through the therapy techniques that the doctor taught him. There's no way he's letting himself have a nightmare tonight, not after he's convinced Lewis that he's ok. After all, he can hide the fact that his knee might hurt. He can't stop himself from screaming in the middle of the night, until it's too late and Robbie has heard.

 

No, tonight, he's going to sleep.

 


	2. Chapter 2

Sam was up bright and early the next morning, running downstairs as soon as he was awake. Upon seeing that James was still asleep, he abruptly started creeping and climbed onto the sofa bed, wriggling himself up so that he was lying next to Hathaway's back. He obviously wasn't as covert as he thought he had been, since James turned over and mumbled.

"What gets you up so early then?"

"The sun." James couldn't argue with that, sunlight was streaming through the windows. He sat up, resigned to the fact that now Sam was awake, he'd not get any more sleep. Blinking blearily at his watch, he saw that it was half past eight. Not as bad as he'd thought then.

"What do you say to some breakfast eh little man? Good idea?"

"Yeah. We can have bacon?"

"Ah, don't think so mate. We're right out of bacon. Actually we're out of everything, gonna have to go to the shops later."

"Do we have Sausages?"

"Oh yes, we have sausages." Well, they had those frozen ones, the ones that are about 30% sausage and 70% god knows what.

"Can we have a sausage sandwich?" James wasn't in the habit of giving his son sandwiches for breakfast, but they needed to finish the bread, and there wasn't really anything else to eat.

 

Ten minutes later, Robbie came downstairs to the sight of a plate of sausage sandwiches.

"Beautiful" he said gleefully as he took one off the top of the pile.

"Only 30 percent sausage." Hathaway mumbles, just as Lewis takes a bite.

"That's enough isn't it?" James snorted and shook his head, as he handed Sam a sandwich on a plate.

"How are you still standing?"

"...Practice?" They both grin and Hathaway sits on the sofa, stretching his left leg out in front of him. Once he's finished his sandwich, he speaks.

"I don't actually have any paint. Ran out the other day...because of that one." James says, smiling as he points at Sam.

"Nooo! You runned all the paint out when you spilled it Daddy!"

"No, you painted it all on the wall."

"I didn't Unca Robbie. I didn't." Lewis laughs, holding his hands up.

"I'm not taking sides on this one kidda. Seems like we need to go and buy some more paint though."

"Yeah. We might as well finish stripping the wallpaper though. We've stripped the whole downstairs, just gotta strip the three bedrooms."

"Ok lad, where do you wanna start?"

"Sammy's room" there's absolutely no hesitation is Hathaway's voice. "I want to sort his room out first." Lewis grins.

"Ok then kidda, where're your tools?"

 

*****************************************************

 

Twenty minutes later, they are all stuck into their work. It was decided that they would all work in one room rather than split up, so they could chat. And also each room would get done quicker this way. After all, Robbie wasn't as young as he'd been last time he'd stripped wallpaper, and Hathaway was effectively using one and a half legs. Sam was happily sat by the door, scraping wet wallpaper off of the wall. Every now and then, he would look at James or Robbie, and copy their stances, or attempt to copy their facial expressions. Robbie had nudged James when he'd realised what the little boy was doing and they both watched him with amusement.

  
"I've just realised, tomorrow is Sunday."

"Well done Jim, I always said you were smart." James rolls his eyes.

"No, I mean, we need to get the paint today, since we'll probably get all three rooms done today, if this one is anything to go by."Lewis looks around, sure enough, they are nearly done, and they've only been at it for two hours.

"Aye, they'll be shut tomorrow won't they?" James grins.

"See Robbie, there _is_ method in my madness. We can do food shopping too, might have had lasagne yesterday, but unless we go and buy food, it'll be tinned ravioli tonight."

"Lunch first James?"

"...Lunch first."

"Where is the shop?"

" Ten minute drive away." Lewis frowns.

"Can you drive with that knee?"

"Yeah, short journey like that's ok."

"Right then...I believe you mentioned lunch."

 

******************************************************

 

They go and buy paint without any hitches, Sam wants his room to be painted blue. James manages to convince him that bright blue is a bad idea and he should have a paler shade. They buy cream paint for the rest of the upstairs. Sam insists on carrying a tub of paint to the car. Lewis watches them both and he can't decide which one needs help the most. Sam is trying to carry something that probably weighs more than he does, and James is clearly feeling his knee as he hauls the paint to the car. In the end, Sam puts his pot on the floor and pushes it. Lewis deftly takes the paint off James, and silences his protests with a stern look, as he puts the paint in the boot.

 

Lewis drives them back, they decide to go and buy food later, its best to get the rooms done first, and then they can eat dinner and relax. Lewis suggests that they paint Sam's room and get it finished before they start on the next.

 

Sam takes to it like a duck to water, getting thoroughly covered in paint and enjoying every minute of it. After a while, Sam's painted all of the wall he can reach and after the phone call to Robbie, James point blanc refuses to let the boy stand on a ladder. After a reasonably short time, Sam is bored and starts to whine and get in the way. To keep him amused, Hathaway starts to paint a number from one to twenty on the wall, and ask Sam which one it is. Robbie listens with a smile on his face. The little boy seems to have one to ten down, but after eleven, he just seems to name numbers.

"One Five!" He shouts happily as James paints a fifteen on the wall.

"What are they called when they are together."

"A pair" Robbie chuckles, turning to Sam and whispering in his ear.

"FIFTEEN!" Sam shouts in excitement and giggles as James paints over the number.

 

Just as they finish painting, Lewis gets a phonecall.

"Hello? Laura?...Well no you wouldn't get an answer, I'm not at home." Robbie puts his hand over the mouthpiece.

"Its Laura."

"Tell her to come over."

"Laura? I'm at James'...he says to tell you to come over."

Its agreed that she'll be there in an hour. Robbie puts the phone down and Sam stares up at him.

"Is it Laura that was shouty?"

"...Aye kidda, but she's not shouty any more. I promise." James picks Sam up, walking out of the room.

"Where we going?"

"You, are going to have a bath Sammy. You can't be all covered in blue paint when Laura gets here."

"Yeah I can. I'll say I a paint mons'er."

"Well you certainly can't eat food with blue hands. Your food will taste like paint."

"Yuck" Sam screws up his face in disgust and laughs.

"Exactly, come on...into the bathroom."

 

*********************************************

 

James returns to the living room, 45 minutes later, with Sam in fresh pyjamas and wrapped in a towel. No sooner has James set him down and sat in the chair, than Sam leaps on him.

"Wanna w'estle."

"Laura will be here soon Sam."

"But I wanna w'estle." James sighs and looks over at Robbie.

"New favourite game" he says, feigning disinterest in Sam's insistence. Then without warning, James grabs Sam and dives to the floor, laughing as Sam's delighted squeals ring out. Robbie watched in amusement as they both rolled around on the floor. Just as Sam sits on Hathaway arm, and holds down his shoulder, all the while giggling uncontrollably, the doorbell rings. James looks up at Robbie, and the older man could swear that he's never seen that much happiness on his friends face before.

"I'll get it shall I?" Robbie says, pretending to be put out.

"Er yeah cheers," James manages to get out. "Come on Sammy, get off now." The little boy presses down harder.

"No! You my pris'ner." James grins and then roars, standing up, and grabbing Sam before he falls to the floor. Sam laughs throatily and then snuggles into James' shoulder. Hathaway turns just in time to see Laura stood there with Robbie. Both of them look like they are trying not to burst out laughing, and Hathaway's cheeks flush red.

 

After Robbie and Laura have composed themselves, they sit down and talk. Sam runs around like a lunatic for the next half an hour, getting in the way and hounding Laura. It seems that he's no longer wary of her, content to sit next to her and babble away. The little boy is clearly hyped up, and it takes Robbie reading him two stories to calm him down.

 

It suddenly occurs to Hathaway that its nearing dinner time, and he has absolutely nothing in.

"I'm going to need to go to the shops if you want dinner. Unless you like tinned pasta." Robbie starts to get up.

"Aye, we were going to go weren't we."

"No worries, I'll go. Sam's in his pyjama's, its not like we can all go and take him with us."

"James, you could hardly carry that tin of paint the other day, and now you expect me to leave you to get a load of shopping."

"Rob-" James starts and Laura looks between them, sighing, exasperation painted all over her face.

"Both of you go. I'll stay here with Sam...go on, you can thank me by cooking dinner eh James?"

 

**********************************************

 

 

It didn't take long to get the shopping. Meat, pasta, bread, vegetables and of course milk. While they are stood in the queue, they meet one of the guys that live on James' street. Hathaway introduces Lewis and Mr Holton, the sixty year old that lives eight doors down. They're just about to pay for their items (and just about to enter an argument about why Lewis shouldn't have to put any money towards it despite his insistence), when they hear the screeching of tyres and look up, just in time to see a car bearing down on the window. The next moment, the front of the shop shatters and the three of them are thrown backwards. Lewis shakes his head to clear the ringing in his ears and slowly sits up. Suddenly he remembers what he was doing and shouts.

"Hathaway!...James?"

"He's ok." Mr Holton is the one that answers, and for a split second his heart stops. Why isn't James answering for himself? Once he gets to them though, he realises that James is indeed ok, if a little dazed.

"Rob-Robbie?"

"Alright Jim?"

"Y-Yeah." As if to prove this point, Hathaway sits up, blinking. He sees Lewis' concerned look and smiles.

"I'm fine. Just whacked my head a little. I didn't even lose consciousness." They all start to stand up shakily and James is just about to make a quip about shopping, when someone screams at them.

"GET ON THE FLOOR NOW! ALL OF YOU!" Lewis could swear that he hears James sigh petulantly. If that's even a thing. Then he decides that if its not a thing, Hathaway is the one most likely to invent it. Its his turn to sigh as he realises that the last thing they need right now, is James in the sort of mood where he'll answer back.

 

To his surprise, Hathaway stays quiet for most of the next five minutes. Lewis isn't sure if its fear or the whack on the head that does it, but he has to admit that he's grateful.

Suddenly everything seems to happen at once. The shopkeeper protests about the situation, and one of the men that are raiding the store, slams his gun into the poor man's head. James' lips thin and Robbie puts a hand on his shoulder, stopping him from the inevitable heroic idiocy that Hathaway is capable of when he's angry. But before he has a chance to talk to the younger man. Mr Holton has leapt up and is grappling with the masked man. The older man manages to rip the mask from the man's head. James grins slightly, he's seen the raiders face. Lewis sees as well, but he has no reason to smile, he knows that this means they are going to be killed. Anyone with such a distinctive face tattoo, is going to be aware that they are easily recognisable. But just as he thinks they are all going to be shot, the man pistol whips Mr Holton and shoves him to the floor, before all of the gang scramble into the car and make a clean getaway.

 

As soon as they leave, Lewis and Hathaway move to the shopkeeper and Mr Holton respectively. Lewis calls to someone to call an ambulance and someone else calls to say that the police are on their way.

 

************************************************

 

They are sat outside an interview room in their old workplace, the familiarity of it all is comforting. Lewis knows that he's shaking slightly, now the adrenaline has worn off, and he can feel James doing the same next to him.

"Well, this is a change."

"What?" It seems that leaving the police hasn't robbed Hathaway of his ability to make even the most ridiculous situation sound normal, with a quip.

"Being questioned for once. You know, not doing all the questioning and the accusing."

"I'd rather go to bed or something...is your face stinging as well?" He isn't going to mention the fact that James is positioning his leg in an odd way. There's no point, Hathaway will just tell him that he's fine.

"Oh yeah." James winces as he grins.

"We should probably go get ourselves checked out."

"I was thinking we find another shop, get some milk, go home and get a takeaway. We'll be in A&E for hours if we go now." Lewis considers this.

"Yeah, I like your plan better." James snorts, and then looks down at his shaking hands, sobering immediately.

"Times like this, I wish I hadn't given up smoking."

 

****************************************************

 

Laura rounds on them as soon as they get in.

"What the hell were you thinking James? You leave your kid with someone, but not your contact number might I add, and then you don't-" She cuts off abruptly when she actually stops to look at them both. Hathaway is limping, much more that he had been earlier. Lewis shuffles in behind him, a hand placed on James' back. They are both peppered with cuts, Hathaway has an impressive one above his right eye.

"What happened?" She asks, concern stripping any annoyance that she might have felt.

"Where's Sam?" James asks, ignoring her question. She points wordlessly at the living room and he limps off, towards his son. Laura turns to Robbie and holds a hand on his shoulder.

"Spill. Why are you both two hours late and covered in cuts? What the hell happened?" Lewis shrugs tiredly .

"Got caught in a ram-raid." He mutters, before heading into the living room to sit down. Laura can do nothing but stare incredulously after him.

 

Sam is asleep on the sofa, comfort blanket tucked snugly around him. He has a corner in his hand and every so often, his fingers twist in it. James is sat on the floor, perpendicular to the sofa, gently stroking his Sam's cheek with his index finger. Without warning, Sam lets go of the blanket and makes a grab for Hathaway's hand in his sleep.

Hathaway's gaze softens further as Sam blinks himself awake.

"D'ddy" he mumbles.

"Hello mate." Sam sits up, clearly still sleepy.

"M'hungry."

"Well, the shopping didn't quite go to plan, so we'll have to get takeaway."

"Pizza?" James looks up at the others, and they all nod.

"Yeah, why not."

 

The pizza arrives and they all tuck in hungrily, adrenaline giving Lewis and Hathaway massive appetites. After they've finished, they all end up in the same places they were before, albeit this time, Laura is sat on the other end of the sofa to Sam. Hathaway is reading the kid a book, sat on the floor as he was last time. Laura and Robbie are quietly talking. Since Hathaway has his back to Hobson, he doesn't see the surreptitious glances she has been giving him, ever since Robbie told her that he whacked his head. They have nothing to worry about though. He's fine, he's told them so, and for once its not a cover up.

 

Ten minutes after James stops reading the story, both he and Sam are asleep. Laura gets up, she should leave, its late and she has to be up in the morning.

"Will you be alright with them?" Lewis smiles.

"Course. Had kids and grand kids Laura, how is this any different?" She smiles at him as he sees her out.

 

He returns to the living room, and picks Sam up, putting him to bed. Hathaway stirs and Lewis is pretty sure that he'll be at least semi awake by the time he gets back. Robbie is grateful that the youngster is already in his pyjama's. The little boy half awakens as Lewis puts the duvet over him.

"Na'night Unc' R'bbie." Lewis smiles softly at the mumbled words.

"Night bonny lad."

 

He returns to James, just in time to see the younger man stretch and look around blearily.

"Laura?"

"She's gone, didn't want to wake you. Sam's in bed. Come on champ, you too." James nods, and then looks sheepish. When Lewis realises that he isn't moving, he turns to him quizzically.

"What is it?"

"I er...My knee's seized up." Lewis sighs.

"You should get that checked out again."

"Nah," James grunts as Robbie bends down and loops his arm under Hathaway's shoulders. "Just happens every now and then." James hisses as Lewis hauls him upright. The ex sergeant gingerly tests his knee, before starting to pull the sofa bed out. Lewis helps, despite James' insistence that he can handle it, and then leaves the younger man to get changed.

 

When he comes back down ten minutes later, James is sprawled across the sofa bed, on top of the covers, asleep. Lewis wants very much to leave him there to carry on sleeping. But he knows that James hasn't taken his tablets and in the long run, waking up now, is better than waking up screaming in a few hours time.

"Wake up a sec Jim."

"Huh...wha?"

"Nightmare pills kidda. Thought you should take them." James blinks in confusion and then nods, taking the proffered glass and tablets. He's asleep again almost before he manages to put the glass down. Lewis rescues it and smiles fondly as he heads back upstairs to sleep.

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

James is up early the next morning. He takes the opportunity to go out for a walk, some time to himself before Sam wakes up and monopolises his time. Not that he'd have it any other way. But sometimes, a calm start in the morning is just what he needs, and now Robbie's there, he can actually take advantage of the chance. He can hardly go out in the morning and leave Sam alone in the house on any other day.

He walks for about half an hour, not going anywhere in particular. He notes with satisfaction, that his knee feels better than it did when they got in yesterday. It still hurts a little, but he'd been expecting not to be able to move it this morning so a little pain isn't really a problem. He grabs some bacon and eggs on the way back. He'd have got more shopping, but he's left his card in the house and he only has three pounds cash in his pocket. They'll have to go out again later, they've _still_ got no food.

 

When he lets himself back into the house, he can hear Sam shouting inside. At first he thinks that the boy is shouting at Lewis, and he wonders what's happened that's made the kid turn on the man that he seems to love. But he soon realises that they are happy shouts.

When he walks into the living room, he sees Robbie and Sam sat on the floor, and it looks very much like Lewis is teaching the child how to play 'Snap', although James has no idea where the older man managed to find the cards. Sam loves it, slamming his hand down on the cards when he notices a pair, and happily shouting snap.

 

He makes them all breakfast and brings it through, just as the other two wind up their game. Over their food, they discuss their plans for the day, and Robbie insists that they do James' room next. They decide to go to the shops first though. Among all the food they need, they also need new paintbrushes. They forgot to wash them out the other day and they seem to be ruined.

Hathaway notices that Sam has barely eaten his food, even though he and Robbie are now almost finished.

"What's wrong with that egg eh Sammy?"

"Nothin'" Sam mumbles, "I not hungry." He pushes his plate away and climbs down from the table as James starts to gather up the dishes. Once he realises that his Dad is about to leave the room, Sam pulls himself onto Robbie's lap and sits there quietly. James frowns when he comes back in and sees this, its not like his son not to eat his food, or to be this subdued in the morning. Robbie just shrugs with a ' _we'll just keep an eye on him_ ' look and they get ready to go to the shops.

 

Robbie takes hold of James' arm as they get close to the house. The younger man looks at him quizzically, as he shifts Sam in his arms. The little boy fell asleep in the car and showed no signs of getting out. Robbie has hold of a couple of bags of shopping, and James'll go back for the rest when he gets Sam inside.

Hathaway looks to where Robbie is looking. There's a bottle and a piece of paper on his doorstep. James glances around nervously, he's still apprehensive of little notes being left for him, after what happened last time he got one. Admittedly, Martin Harper's father didn't at any point give him a bottle of wine. A paralysing drug yes, but not a bottle of wine. They go to the bottle and Lewis picks the note up, reading aloud.

_"Dear Mr Hathaway,_

_I wanted to thank you and your friend for calling the ambulance and staying until they arrived. The police told me that you have given a description on the man that M Holton unmasked._

_Sorry, about the quality of the wine, most of it was smashed in the raid. Hope you both came out of it relatively unscathed._

_Thank you very much again,_

_Mr Carson"_

James smiled.

"He didn't have to," Robbie looked confused. "Mr Carson owns the store that got smashed up."

Oh...How does he know your address James?" Hathaway smiled at the copper's instincts coming out in Robbie.

"Paper round. One of his lad delivers the paper every week."

"Every  _week?_ " Hathaway shrugs.

"I don't read the paper that much." Robbie shakes his head, that boy is forever destined to be just a little bit odd.

They go inside and sit Sam on the sofa, before bringing the rest of the shopping in and Robbie sets about cooking them some pasta for lunch. When he comes in twenty minutes later, with pasta mixed with pancetta, James is reading a book to Sam, who is looking very sleepy. He has a fist balled in James shirt and his head is resting on James' lap, the rest of his body curled into itself.

"Grubs up." James starts to get up, and Sam whimpers a bit.

"No" he mumbles, and tries to pull James back down onto the sofa. James responds by picking him up and carrying to the table. When Hathaway sits his son on the chair, Sam starts to cry.

"What's wrong mate? Come on, you've got to eat some lunch."

"Not hungry."

"Sam, what's wrong."

"Don't feel well. My tummy hurts."

"You still need to eat."

"No, don't want it."

"How about you come and sit on my lap to eat? You try and eat a little bit on my lap yeah?" Sam nods sadly and James picks him up, at the same time pulling the child's plate over.

Sam picks at his food for a few minutes. Eventually, Robbie takes Sam's hand and the boy shifts to look at him.

"Come on kidda, come over here. Let your Dad eat his lunch." Sam nods, holding his arms out for Robbie to grab him. Hathaway gives Lewis a grateful smile, and tucks into his pasta hungrily.

 

Sam becomes extremely clingy, and refuses to relinquish his grip on Robbie. So as it stands Robbie is stripping wall paper one armed, his left arm holding Sam, who is dozing on his shoulder.

Suddenly, Robbie's phone goes off and James quickly takes Sam off him so he can answer it

"Hello? Adrian is that you?" James grins. Kershaw. He'd had the pleasure of meeting DS Adrian Kershaw a few years after he started working with Robbie. Kershaw had been a DC when Lewis was working with Morse, and the two younger men had hit it off rather well. In time, James and Kershaw had also got on very well, even if they had developed a friendly rivalry.

"James, Adrian wants to know if we fancy the pub later?" Hathaway nods to the child in his arms.

"Nah, he's ill, and in any case, they wouldn't let him in the pubs. Tell him cheers, but I'll pass, catch him another day. You go though, don't let us stop you"

"James can't come mate. But yeah I'm up for it. Not a late one though, I'm not as young as I used to be" Robbie laughs at whatever Adrian's answer is. "Cheeky sod! The Trout then? Half seven?" He puts the phone down.

"You don't mind Jim?"

"Nah, course not. Someone's gotta look after your social life sir." He repeats something he said to Lewis ages ago, although he can't remember for the life of him remember what case it was.

"What is it? Gang up on an old copper day. You and Kershaw, I swear, you two are the cheekiest bloody coppers I know."

"We aim to please."

 

**********************************************

 

They get Hathaway's room stripped and half painted by half five. James takes the paintbrushes out into the garden and sticks them in a bucket full of water When he returns, he decided to make them dinner. He prepares Shepherd's pie and then wanders into the living room, where Sam and Robbie are watching Thomas the Tank Engine on the DVD that Robbie brought over with him. He picks up the wine that the shopkeeper left for them.

"Robbie?" he says, wiggling the wine bottle.

"Aye, only a small one mind, I'm off to the pub later remember." Hathaway comes back with two glasses and pour half a glass for Robbie, and a much fuller one for himself. Lewis raises an eyebrow at him as he takes a sip of his wine. He's never been a big wine drinker, and this stuff just goes to consolidate his view that the grapes themselves actually nicer.

"I'm not going to get drunk Robbie, not with Sammy about." Lewis nods, even though he's not entirely sure of the truth in the statement.

 

Dinner is ready at about quarter to seven and this time, Sam manages to eat some of it. But he quickly decides that he doesn't want any more. He makes a grab for James' wine glass.

"Beena." Sam says, still trying to get hold of it.

"No, its not Ribena Sam. Its wine, and its definitely not for kids." Sam stops his campaign to get hold of the glass at that, and climbs onto James' lap.

"Feel hot Daddy, I don't like it" James feels the boy's forehead and frowns. Sam does feel a little warmer than he should. Robbie stands up.

"Have you got a thermometer Jim, where is it?"James points at a nearby box.

"Should be in there Robbie, cheers."

Sam's definitely got a temperature, although it's not dangerously high. Hathaway gets up with him and walks over to the box where the thermometer was located.

"I think you need some medicine little man. Open your mouth Sammy. I promise, this one tastes like strawberries, its not nasty like the other one."

"P'omise?"

"I promise." Sam takes the medicine and then goes to sit on the sofa. James looks at the clock.

"Right he had that at quarter past seven, so he can't have any more till..." Hathaway consults the back of the bottle. 6 hours between doses. "Quarter past one" Robbie looks at his watch.

"Bloody hell, I'm supposed to be there in ten minutes. And I didn't even finish my wine." James picks the glass up, there's only about a quarter of it left.

"That problem is easily solved" he states and the drinks the rest. He sees Lewis expression. "I promise Robbie, no more." Lewis nods, James wouldn't lie to him outright like that, not about drinking, not after last time.

 

Lewis leaves, and Hathaway puts Sam to bed. The little boy is clingy and grumpy and he refuses to let James leave the room.

 

*********************************************

 

"So Robbie, why couldn't James make it. I haven't seen the bugger for ages."

"His bairn's ill. And it _was_ a bit short notice Adrian. We'd never have found someone to look after Sam." Kershaw chokes on his beer.

"His kid? When the hell did Hathaway father a kid? And with who? Is she a looker? I always reckoned that jammy sod would get a right looker."

"Aye, hard to believe isn't it? The little lad is four. Great kid. Bloody good for James as well. As for his wife, well, she _was_ a looker yeah." Kershaw sighs quietly.

"What happened to her?" Robbie recounts the events of three months ago. From the moment that James had turned up on his doorstep, kid in tow, to the moment that he'd left Hathaway's house, the lad leaning on a crutch and waving goodbye. After he's finished, Kershaw gives out a low whistle.

"That's rough. Poor bugger."

"Aye. Not had the easiest year, has James. Excuse me mate, just going to nip to the toilet."

 

As he washes his hands, Lewis realises that he feels a little sick. That's typical that is. First night at the pub in a fair while and he's ill. Its probably whatever Sammy's gone and picked up. Well its inevitable really, James will probably get it at some point soon too. Still, its a pain.

 

*********************************************

 

James stands up shakily. Bugger it, he's coming down with the same thing Sam's got. But he hopes Sam doesn't feel like this. James' vision is blurring and his stomach is seemingly trying to knot itself. He staggers into the living room. One look at the dinner things and Hathaway decides that they can wait till morning, instead, opting to flop onto the sofa. Within minutes, he is asleep, all pain forgotten.

 

He's oblivious to the sirens and flashing lights outside.

*********************************************

 

Robbie stays at the pub for another hour, before he decides that he should be getting back. He feels a little guilty that he's left James looking after Sam while he goes to the pub, and he's ready to go back and help. He bids Kershaw farewell outside and they go their separate ways, after having made promises to meet again soon, with James this time.

 

Once he gets to Hathaway's road, Robbie's stomach has eased up a little. He frowns as he looks up, the house on the end of the street, has white and blue police table across the front gate and there is a uniformed copper standing guard. He recognises the man and goes over to talk to him.

"Hiya Frank, what's going on here?"

"Inspector Lewis." Robbie shakes the proffered hand. "I didn't know you lived round here."

"I don't, I'm staying with a friend. What's happened?"

"Oh, geezer's been beaten to death. Friday night, what else?" Lewis feels a chill in the pit of his stomach, and it's nothing to do with how he felt earlier.

"What's the victim's name Frank?"

"Er Edward. Edward Holton I think...why?"

"Nothing, just wondered. I better be off mate." Lewis says as he heads back to James' house, leaving a confused constable in his wake.

 

He lets himself into the house and immediately starts to speak.

"James I think we might have a problem-" He begins, before he realises that he can hear Sam crying in the living room.

"James?...Sam kidda, what's wrong."

"Unca Robbiiiiiie" Sam sobs and Lewis rushes into the living room, heart in his mouth. The boy is stood next to the sofa, pushing James as he sleeps and crying fearfully.

"Sam, calm down, tell me what's wrong. Shhh Laddie, come on. What's wrong?" Sam swallows back sobs and turns back to Hathaway.

"...I c-can't wake up Daddy." Sam pushes on James' arm again and when nothing happens, he cries louder. "He not waking up...e-even when I push hard on his arm." Lewis can see that the little boy has worked himself up into a real state. He gives Sam a hug, squeezing him a little.

"Shh now bonny lad, Daddy probably had a bit too much wine. Come on, we'll wake him up now ok?" The four year old nods, hiccups breaking through his tears.

 

Lewis pokes James. Nothing happens. He turns to the wine, to see how much James drank. But there's no more missing than there was when he left. He frowns, shaking Hathaway a little as Sam watches.

"Come on Jim, wake up you lazy sod." The frown doesn't leave his face as he mutters; "Wake the bloody hell up and help me take care of your son." Its then that Lewis realises that James is very relaxed. His head lolls back and his eye lids open a little. Robbie can see the whites of his eyes as they too roll back, and suddenly everything feels much more worrying.

"Jim?" the ex inspector says shakily, as he puts a hand on James' neck to feel for a pulse. When he eventually finds it, James' pulse is weak and erratic and Lewis realises that something is very wrong.

He turns James on his side, into the recovery position, and quickly calls an ambulance. Sam goes back to trying to wake his father up and Robbie knows he should stop him. But he has too much to do. He reflects that its lucky he feels better now, with a stomach ache, this would be even harder to...That's it! The wine. Its got to be the wine. After all, they both had the Shepherd's Pie, as did Sam, and clearly whatever it is, has effected James worse. But Robbie only had a few sips of wine, and James had at least two glasses, two and a quarter if you count the wine of Robbie's that he finished up.

He picks Sam up, the boy is still crying, and he knows he should explain, but right now, he needs to sort some things out. He grabs one of Sam's non spill cups from a box, and fills it up with wine, making sure it can't leak out from anywhere.

"Whatever you do Sammy, You mustn’t drink this."

"Not Beena?"

"Definitely not lad."

Robbie then calls Innocent. He tells her what's going on, what he suspects. She's shocked, understandably and after she assures him that she'll get forensic down to examine the bottle, he promises that he'll keep her informed of what's going on.

 

Next he grabs Sam's comfort blanket from where the kid had dropped it on the floor in his panic. He also grabs the medicine that James had given Sam earlier, he has a feeling that he's going to be at the hospital for a while, and he has no choice but to bring Sam with him.

 

Just then the paramedics arrive, and Lewis goes trough what he knows and suspects as calmly as he can. They agree that it looks like James has been poisoned with something, and they put a breathing mask on him, in case he stops breathing. Robbie can't help but notice that James hasn't regained consciousness at all.

 

It takes all his energy to try and keep Sam calm during the ambulance ride. The little boy has clearly worked out that something is very wrong with his father, and fear is causing him to cry and wriggle in Lewis' grasp. Once they get to the JR, James is wheeled off, amid urgent voices and long words, to be treated as quickly as he can be. Robbie is left in the waiting area, clutching a bag with a blanket and a beaker full of poisoned wine, and trying to comfort an almost inconsolable child.

 

****************************************************

 

Its an hour later, when a nurse comes up to him and speaks.

"Mr Lewis?" he nods. "Mr Hathaway is out of the operating theatre now. They've performed a gastric Lavage." At his blank look, she explains. "They've given him a stomach pump. He's in a side room, you can go and see him now."

"Is he going to be ok?"

"Its early day's yet Mr Lewis, why don't you and the kid go and see him?" Lewis' heart sinks. If James was safe, they'd have told him so. 'Early days' is just another way of saying, 'don't get your hopes up'.

 

**************************************************

 

James looks terrible. He's deathly pale,and the veins under his skin stand out blue and obvious. There's a tube feeding oxygen into his nose, and a drip, giving him God knows what to help him out. Robbie slumps into the chair, a hand over his eyes.

"Daddy?" Sam asks, and Robbie pulls himself together. He needs to be strong for he little boy stood next to him.

"Come here bonny lad, Come and sit up here. We can watch over your Dad for the doctors, for a little while yeah?"

 

After twenty minutes of alternately crying and staring at James lying in the hospital bed, Sam falls asleep in Robbie's arms. Once he's sure that the boy is indeed asleep, Robbie slumps in the chair.

"Shit Jim, what the bloody hell have we got ourselves into this time eh lad?" Sam snuffles in sleep and clutches Robbie's hand in his sleep.

"You've got to pull through this bonny lad. Sam needs you." There's no answer, just the rasping sound of James' breathing and the soft beeps of the machines he's hooked up to.

"Fuck James. I'm too old to look after a kiddie again. Don't leave me without a choice...please."

 

****************************************************

 

An hour later, James' only son wakes up. Sam sits up on Robbie's lap, gravely taking everything in. He doesn't start crying again, but he's holding onto the older man's shirt very tightly.

"Unca Robbie?" he says quietly, not wanting to make too much noise.

"Yes Sam?"

"Why is there a tube in Daddy's nose? What's it for?" There is fear in the timid voice and Robbie recognises it as fear of the unknown.

Well kidda," Lewis pauses, unsure exactly how much he should explain. "Your Dad isn't breathing as much as the doctor's would like him to be, so they've put that tube there to help him get enough oxygen." Sam nods, staring at the bed. He still looks unsure and Lewis realises that teaching him about what is happening, is the only way to ease his fear. The boy is a lot like James in that respect, happier if he understands things.

"And that tube there," Lewis continues, pointing at the IV drip, "Is giving Daddy all the medicine he needs."

"Cos he can't have it in his mouth if he's asleep?"

"Aye bonny lad." Lewis certainly isn't going to explain the difference between asleep and unconscious to the child. Especially when he isn't sure which state he younger man is in.

"What about on his finger, why's that for?"

"Its a clip to see how his heart is doing. See that screen there? Those numbers are to show the doctors and nurses how well his heart is beating."

"Is Daddy's heart working prop'ly?" Lewis smiles despite it all, there's never been anything wrong with James' heart, physically or emotionally.

"Oh yes. Don't worry about that." The little boy smiles a little, and Robbie can see that he was right. Now that Sam understands what is going on, he seems calmer, although he's still clinging to Lewis like there's no tomorrow.

"Is Daddy gonna die?" Sam asks, and all the fear is back in his voice. Robbie had been hoping that Sam wouldn't ask him that question.

"Daddy is very ill Sammy. He drank something that was really bad for him. But the doctors are good, and they are working hard to fix him ok?" Sam nods again, and Lewis breathes a mental sigh of relief. He doesn't want to plant that doubt that James will be ok in Sam's mind. This way, he hasn't promised the lad things that he has no control over.

"Come on bonny lad, we've got to go home now."

"No! Not leave Daddy on his own. He'll be lonely." Robbie smiles sadly.

"He's not on his own Sam, all the doctors will come and check on him. How about you give him a good night kiss eh?" He holds Sam over the bed, as the little boy kisses James' cheek.

"Na'night Daddy." James' hand twitches and Robbie smiles. Asleep rather than unconscious then. That has to be good.

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

They visit Hathaway again early the next morning, and the nasal cannula is gone, which Robbie takes to be a sign of improvement. James is most definitely awake, although he's still very weak, and he doesn't open his eyes. As they walk into the room however, Hathaway smiles slightly. This is all lost on Sam as he pesters Robbie to pick him up so he can see.

"Is Daddy better today Unca Robbie?" Robbie considers this, James is still stupidly pale and looks like he's been drained of all his blood, but he's reacted to Sam's voice whether the little boy can see that or not.

"Aye, I think he is lad." A thought occurs to him. "Do you think Daddy will feel _even_ better if you lie down with him Sammy?" The little boy looks unsure, staring at the drip in the back of his fathers hand. Robbie reassures him;

"We'll be very careful." Sam smiles and nods, already stretching towards the bed.

"Hang about kidda, I'll have to give your Dad a bit of help first." Lewis gently moves James' arm, so that there is enough space between it and his torso to fit the four year old. He then carefully lowers Sam into the gap, whereupon the child snuggles into James.

"There you go kidda, "Robbie mumbles, and he couldn't have said which one of them he was talking to.

 

Lewis watches, as James painstakingly brings his arm up to cradle his son as best he can. The young man slowly turns his face and plants a kiss on the top of Sam's head. He still doesn't open his eyes and Lewis reckons he can't, because there is no way James wouldn't look at Sam if he could. Sam is oblivious to this and he starts to talk to James, telling him about a dream that he'd had. Hathaway doesn't reply at any point, but he smiles as Sam's chatter fills the room.

 

It soon becomes clear to Robbie that James has lost consciousness again and he gently lifts Sam off the bed and holds him on his hip, shushing the little boy's noises of protest.

"Don't want to leave"

"We need to let Daddy get his rest kidda."

"He is rest...not waked up since yes'erday."

"That's because his body is tired Sam. But we still need to let him rest." Sam drops his head onto Robbie's shoulder and loops his arms around the older man's neck.

"Want Daddy to be out of the hostipal." Sam says sadly and Robbie gives him a little squeeze.

"Aye I know bonny lad, me too."

 

*********************************************************

 

Jean calls him just before he starts the car.

"Robbie?"

"Hello, Jean, is that you?"

"It is. How's James?"

"Alive." Lewis mutters, aware that although Hathaway had been a little better, he was still pretty bloody ill. "He smiled while Sam was talking earlier, got to count for something I guess."

"He'll be ok Robbie. He's tough that one, and you know what he can be like when he's got something to fight for. I'd think Sam comes very high on his list of things to fight for."

"Aye, I hope you're right." Lewis says,

"I am Robbie, you'll see. Anyway, I just thought you should know, forensics got back to us on the bottle. Turns out they can work pretty speedily when its one of our own, even a former one."

"What did they say?" He hides a smirk, he and James had often complained about how slow forensics could be.

"Definitely poison. They aren't sure what. Looks to be synthetic or something, could be something as simple as household cleaner apparently. The bottle had been tampered with, super glue used to reseal it."

"Like in the lady bishop case."

"Yeah. Where did it come from Robbie?"

"The shopkeeper of the shop that got ram-raided...Laura did tell you?"

"Yes she did. I suppose I should get some of our boys down to talk to him." Lewis sees James in his minds eye, pale and seemingly on the brink of death, breathing tubes and drips attached to his normally clear arms and face.

"Oh there are a few choice words I'd like to have with him Jean. I'll let you know what he says."

Jean looks at the phone in frustration, She can't stop him, he's not under her command any more. One thing she does know, if the shopkeeper did poison the wine, he'll regret it when he meets Robbie Lewis.

 

*********************************************************

 

Lewis walks through the doors, glass boarded up. He takes a deep breath, it won't do to get angry, he's got Sam with him.

"Hello Mr Carson, I see you're still open."

"Yes. Yes we are. Aren't you James' friend?" Lewis nods curtly.

"Aye I am yeah."

"Where is he then?"

"He's in hospital Mr Carson." Innocent would be proud of him, Lewis thinks, he's being remarkably calm.

"What? Why?"

"Like you don't know." Lewis tones his voice down a little bit, as Sam shrinks into his shoulder.

"Just what are you saying Mr..."

"Lewis. Robert Lewis. I'm saying that the bottle of wine that you left for him was poisoned, and I think you've got some explaining to do."

"What wine? I never left him any wine. And I certainly didn't poison any." The shop keeper draws himself up to his full height, which is still a few inches shorter than Lewis. "And I don't like what you're implying Mr Lewis." Robbie decides to play it safe, until he has more facts.

"I'm sorry Mr Carson. I'm just worried about him you know. I mean I have to look after his kid, and he's not looking like he's going to get better soon..." Robbie didn't care that he knew that James would, in all probability, get better.

"No, no. I quite understand. I imagine the child's a bit of a handful eh, with his Dad away?"

"Actually, he's as good as gold." Lewis says curtly, as he walks out.

 

He phones Jean, he knows he ought to, and tells her everything that went on. She listens to his side of the story, and then informs him, that they got a match for the fingerprints on the bottle. They now know the supposed name and address for the man that Mr Holton unmasked. Officers are currently being briefed to arrest him. Lewis thanks her for letting him know and assures her that he will be more than happy to pick him out in an identity parade.

 

Lewis is still suspicious of the shop keeper, but he does concede to himself that it could just be that he's taken an instant dislike to the man. Sam starts to grumble that a) he is hungry, and b) he misses his Dad. So Lewis takes him back to James' house and makes him some cheese on toast. He takes advantage of the boy falling asleep, to clear up the dinner things from the night before. He had meant to do it yesterday evening, but his head had been filled with images of Hathaway lying in hospital and he'd just had to sleep. Sam had stayed in his room for a whole five minutes before he'd come to where Lewis had been dozing on the armchair and climbed up next to him. Robbie had woken up in the morning with Sam's face buried in his side, and the comfort blanket carefully placed over the both of them.

But now, content in the knowledge that James is making at least a little progress, he gets on with it. Just as he finishes, a very sleepy child demands to visit his father. Lewis doesn't protest. Its 4pm. There's still time to go and visit.

 

*********************************************************

 

Lewis watches as James' breathing shifts. The younger man turns his head, and Robbie waits patiently as James blinks his eyes open.

"...What?..." James asks, voice rasping as he brings a hand up to touch his throat.

"Its probably where they put the tube in Jim, you're ok."

Robbie tried to stop the younger man worrying any more than he had to. He's in no doubt that Hathaway is in pain, and the man is still pretty weak. James tries to speak again;

"What...hap-" Suddenly, Hathaway's eyes widen. "S-Sam...W'Sam?" He starts to panic and Lewis is quick to try and reassure him.

"He's here James, he's here. Sammy's asleep on the chair." Robbie thinks that this will calm the ex-sergeant down. He's wrong. Hathaway starts to struggle upright, in an attempt to see his son.

"S-Sam?" he gasps, as he falls back on the pillow.

"Easy lad,easy." Robbie says, as James tries to sit up again. He slips his arm behind James' back and gently sits him up so he can see Sam curled up on the chair. Hathaway visibly relaxes and Lewis carefully lies him down again.

"What...happened?" Robbie pauses a little, unsure whether James is well enough for the conversation. He decides that James will just keep asking until he's told anyway.

"You were poisoned Jim. Came back from the pub to find Sammy trying to wake you up. You're a lucky lad."

"...The wine?...Don't feel...lucky." Hathaway suddenly heaves, and Robbie grabs the cardboard sick pan by the side of the bed. He only just remembers in time, that James doesn't have the strength to turn him self over. He hauls James onto his side, in time for the younger man to throw up. Hathaway heaves again, and Lewis rubs his back as James breathes deeply.

When James thinks he's done, he puts a hand on Robbie's arm, trying to lever himself back onto the bed. Lewis catches him as this inevitably fails, and helps him into a comfortable position.

"Got...any...water?" Hathaway manages, his throat still evidently hurts.

"There is a bit yeah, but I don't know if you're allowed to drink any yet." James looks upset at this, Robbie pats his arm.

"I'll go ask a doctor James. You just lie there. And don't try anything stupid."

 

When Lewis returns with a doctor, Sam has woken up and stolen his seat. James has a hand hanging limply off of the side of the bed, and Sam is holding onto it, as Hathaway runs his fingers over Sam's. The little boy can't see James face over the bed rail, and so he can't see that James is grinning.

Lewis enters the room properly and Sam wriggles his hand out of James' clammy one.

"Doctor's need t'see you Daddy."

Hathaway doesn't move his hand away, even after Sam has removed his. The doctor speaks.

"Ah, Mr Hathaway, now you're awake, we need to take you for some tests."

"...Right" James doesn't seem to thrilled at this prospect, and Robbie can't say that he blames him. Its probably going to involve long tubes with cameras on the end and all sorts, if the doctors words as they had walked back towards Hathaway's room were anything to go by. Robbie picks Sam up as the wheel James out in the bed.

"Where they taking Daddy, Unca Robbie?"

"They've got to go and do some tests, to see how your Dad is doing."

"A'see if he's getting better?"

"Aye, they won't be long lad, don't worry."

"Then he can come home?" Lewis remembers how weak the younger man is, despite the fact that he's alert this morning.

"I don't think so kidda, not today." Sam sighs against Robbie's shoulder.

"Daddy should have drinked Beena instead. Beena doesn't make you go'a hostipal." Lewis can't help but smile at the little boy's words. He considers explaining that wine doesn't normally mean you have to go to hospital, but then thinks better of it. That would mean explaining about 'nasty men' again, and it had unsettled the poor lad enough last time.

 

*********************************************************

 

Innocent arrives just as the doctor is bringing James back from the barrage of tests he's endured. Hathaway is asleep, obviously tired by whatever methods the doctor has been using. Sam takes it upon himself to sit on the end of the bed, 'keeping guard' over his Dad. Jean takes the seat that Robbie vacated and watches James for a while, a hand on his arm. Robbie drags the other chair over, and puts it by Sam, sitting down. After a little while, Jean speaks;

"How's he doing?"

"I think he's on the mend. He's been awake and talking so that's good." Jean smiles a little, but her expression sobers as she looks back at James.

"He looks bloody terrible Robbie."

"Aye, I know. But he'll make it Jean, he'll be ok."

"I don't doubt it." She suddenly becomes business-like. "Uniform picked up the bugger that you both ID'd. We've got him down the station."

"You need one of us to do a formal ID at a line up." She nods, hesitantly.

"What?"

"We need two ID's Robbie." He stares at her blankly. "The shop keeper won't testify, he's too scared, especially after learning about Mr Holton's death, and James' hospitalisation." It takes a few seconds for it to click, and then Robbie shakes his head vigorously.

"No! Jean, he could barely sit up earlier...He needs to stay here, he can't just go gallivanting off to the station."

"I know, I know Robbie. I wouldn't have even suggested it if there was any other way, you know that don't you?" Lewis nods. He does, Jean would never intentionally cause James any more pain than she had to.

"Not tonight."

"No. In the morning. I'll ask him in the morning. He can say no if he doesn't-"

"-He won't say no. You know he won't."

"I'm sorry."

"Its not your fault. Anyway if we didn't ask him, the bastard that did it would get off scot-free wouldn't he? And I don't think Jim would talk to either of us again." They both chuckle a little, it feels out of place in the bland hospital room. Jean gets up, smoothing down her dress.

"Get better soon James eh?" She says to the sleeping man. Jean turns to Lewis.

"Hang in there Robbie, he'll be ready to take Sam out of your arms before you know it." Robbie smiles as she leaves, hoping that she is right.

 

 

*********************************************************

 

Robbie shifts slightly in his sleep. His back twinges as he moves in the rough plastic seat. That isn't what wakes him up though. What does, is the sound of a worried little boy, talking desperately;

"No, Daddy. Is not real. Wake up please, you ok." Lewis opens his eyes, to see that Sam has dragged one of the chairs over to James' bedside. The child has one hand on Hathaway's arm. His other hand is clumsily trying to stroke James' head. Hathaway is muttering quietly but urgently, and jerking about a little. Suddenly, Robbie remembers that he's not had his Prazosin for two nights.

"Daaddy, wake up, pleeease. You jus' need the tab'ets. Is ok. Jus' wake up. Is all ok. P'omise." Robbie sits up properly and Sam snaps around to look at him. He looks tearful, and it doesn't take Lewis long to see what is upsetting the kid.

"Unca Robbie! I can't wake Daddy up" Robbie carefully moves Sam to sit on the bed and sets about trying to wake Hathaway up. He can envisage James being woken up in the middle of the night for a good few weeks, just so that Sam can check that he _will_ actually wake up.

While he's trying to coax James out of his dream, Robbie realises that Sam was parroting some of the things that Lewis himself has said to James. Robbie wonders how Sam coped before he was there. Did the child just lie in bed and pretend that he couldn't hear James screaming? Before his third birthday, Chrissy would have dealt with James' nightmares. But what about after her death? Lewis bets that they were even worse for a fair time after that and the only other person in the house was Sam.

Suddenly, James starts awake. He groans as he realises what's happened.

"...Sorry" he mumbles as Sam grins, obviously happy that he's awake now, and not dreaming. Robbie glances at his watch. Eleven pm.

"Don't be lad, just try and get some sleep."

 

It turns out, that just isn't destined to happen. James wakes in fear again, three times in the next two hours. Robbie is getting tired, and James is positively exhausted. Luckily, Sam sleeps through it all. After the third time, Robbie gets a doctor, in an attempt to find out if he can be given Prazosin from the hospital pharmacy. He can't, Robbie doesn't know what dosage he's on. But the doctor takes one look at James' fourth nightmare and agrees to give him some sedative to help him sleep.

 

Its another half an hour before Robbie and Sam get back to James' house and Robbie is grateful that Sam fell asleep again in the car, he puts the little boy to bed, confident that he'll stay there. Then he flops down into his borrowed bed and sleeps deeply.

 


	5. Chapter 5

The next time James wakes up, there is another familiar face sat by his bedside. He can feel a hand laid gently on his arm and he blinks his eyes open to see Jean sitting beside him.

"...Jean?" She smiles, nodding. He scowls mentally, what did he go and ask that for? Who else does he know that looks like Jean Innocent? He hopes she'll put his stupidity down to the concoction of drugs they're pumping into him and the fact that he's only just woken up. And the sedative he vaguely remembers them giving him last night.

"How are you feeling James?" Hathaway considers this. He no longer feels like he's dying, like he had the first time he'd woken up, when all he'd been able to do was concentrate on breathing. That and the fact that although he could feel his son next to him, he couldn't muster the energy to open his eyes and look. No, he definitely doesn't feel like that.

"Weak as the proverbial kitten. But much better, thank you." She's holding something back, he's sure of it. But he feels too washed out to apply that much brain power trying to work it out.

"That's good, Robbie can stop walking around like someone is nearly deadd now then." What? He's really not up to this, he'd have preferred her to come and visit when he felt a little bit more with it, as it is, he just feels a fool.

"Who's was was nearly dead?" He mumbles, trying to keep a handle on the conversation. Its not helping that her earrings are really sparkly and they're distracting him from a coherent thought. He sees her frown and wonders what he's done now.

" _You_ were n-...Oh James, go back to sleep. I'm sorry, you're obviously not up to this." A little part of his brain is agreeing with her. But another part is insisting that she means something other than the current conversation by 'this'. And he'll be dammed if he lets her think he isn't up to whatever 'this' is.

"Not up t'what?" Jean sighs and takes his hand. Her fingers feel unnaturally warm, or maybe his are just really cold.

"They think they caught the bloke that did it James, the guy that killed Mr Holton and nearly killed you." His fingers clench over hers, and from the look on her face, his own expression must be one of anger.

"What do you need me to do?" She shakes her head.

"James, don't be stupid. You can barely stay awake."

"I want him put away Jean. He nearly orphaned my son." Its funny how anger focuses the mind, how it shakes away the fog and makes him feel more lucid than he has in days. Jean looks at him appraisingly.

"Robbie's agreed to do an identity parade. The shopkeeper is too scared, but we need two people to identify him."

"I'll do it"

"We can only hold him for four more hours, you're in no fit state-"

"I'll do it." She sighs again, he can almost see her thinking that he's a stubborn sod.

"If you're sure..." he nods emphatically. "...then I can have Robbie pick you up later, depending on what the doctor's say. Laura said she'll have Sam." He smiles.

 

************************************************

 

Its about two hours later that Lewis comes to pick him up. He's been resting, literally moving nothing in a attempt to conserve the little energy he has. Robbie helps him off the bed and he stands, swaying slightly. This is suddenly not he best of ideas. But he won't back out, because he wants the bastard put away. He takes a step forward and pain shoots up his left leg.

"Argh, fuck" he moans as he stumbles against the bed. Lewis is there, picking him back up again, and supporting him along the corridor.

"You didn't hurt it again did you?"

"No...no, I just haven't used it for a few days have I?"

 

He signs the waiver as best he can, hating the sight of his shaky writing. He listens as the doctor tells him that he has to come straight back to the hospital afterwards. Lewis forces him to sit in the wheelchair that they're borrowing. It appears Lewis doesn't care about his dislike for the things. But he doesn't argue, he knows that the older man is right. He won't make it to the station if he has to walk.

 

Lewis isn't allowed to go with him, since he has to identify the suspect separately. If he hears what James says, his own identification is invalid.

 

So its Innocent that helps him into the interview room, behind the two way mirror. As the line up shuffles in, he wishes that he wasn't leaning on her quite so much. If there is one thing that Hathaway does not like, it's being seen as weak. He knows that Jean won't judge him, but that doesn't stop him judging himself. He's still a young man and he's reasonably fit. He shouldn't need the help of a woman twelve years his senior, to walk into a room and stand for ten minutes. Nevertheless, he is unbelievably grateful for her support.

 

He studies the men carefully, but it doesn't take him long. The man with the spider web tattoo on his face, and a sneering smile.

"Number 3" he says quietly, as he looks at the man that caused him to spend the last three days almost delirious in hospital. Not that that bothers him so much. What really bothers him, is that the scum-bag of a man that he just pointed out, nearly left his son with no one in the world.

 

Innocent tugs at his arm and helps him outside and back into the chair. James suddenly realises that he's still in the light blue shirt and cotton trousers that the hospital gave him, and he feels strangely vulnerable in them.

He's not allowed to communicate with Robbie until the older man has done his identification. It was previously agreed that he'd wait for Lewis and then Lewis would drive him back to the hospital. What he doesn't know, is that Laura's bringing Sam to meet them. As much as Sam seems to love Hobson, and as safe as he feels around Lewis, he wants his Dad.

 

He gets a text off Lewis, telling him that he'll be five minutes, just needs to go see a man about a dog, which seems suspicious to James. That's the phrase you say when you don't want anyone to know what you're doing. His fears are allayed however, as he hears a kids voice. A voice that he'd be able to pick out in a crowd of talking children.

 

Sure enough, Sam came running around the corner and practically launched himself at James.

"Daaaaadddy!" he shouted, as he clambered up onto James' lap and hugged him.

"Hello little man. Have you been behaving yourself for Uncle Robbie and Auntie Laura?"

"Yes Daddy." James glanced up at the 'Uncle' and 'Auntie' in question and they both nod.

"He's had a few wobbles, but that was mostly because I told him that we couldn't come and see you at one am" smiles Robbie.

"Are you coming home now?" James smile falters a bit, but it doesn't disappear.

"No, sorry mate. I'm still ill. That's what the doctors say."

"The doctors don't know Daddy."

"They do this time kid." Sam's lip trembles.

"But...But I want you to come home."

"And I want to come home too Sammy. But I'm not allowed. Soon though. I'll be home soon." And he will, he can feel that he's better, even than he was this morning.

 

************************************************

 

Lewis drives them all back to the hospital and he, Sam and Hathaway spend an enjoyable afternoon playing snap. As enjoyable as they can find an afternoon spent in a hospital side room anyway.

Now that its clear that Hathaway is doing better and out of danger, Sam has relaxed a lot and starts to ask James questions.

"Wassit like to get poisoned?"

"...Er..." He looks to Lewis for guidance and the older man merely shrugs. _Your kid mate, s'up to you what to tell him._

"Well...it was like having a tummy ache-"

"-Like I had."

"Yeah, but worse. And then you go to sleep." Sam looks thoughtful.

"Was I poisoned?"

"Course not. What makes you say that?"

"Well, I had tummy ache, then I went sleep" Lewis smiles and shifts Sam onto his other knee.

"Ah, but the difference is bonny lad, you woke up again." The little boy frowns at this, looking wide eyed at his father.

"So if we not called the am'lance men...then you would have not woked up?" James panics a little. What's he supposed to say to that? _No, if Uncle Robbie had been much later coming home, I'd have died son._ Somehow, that doesn't seem like the best thing to say. Thankfully, he's saved from answering as Sam continues;

"Doesn't matter. We could have made you drunk lotsa hot tea. Poured it in you mouth when you was sleepin'." Sam turned to look at Robbie and whispers conspirationally. "Daddy drinks lotsa lotsa tea. In'a morning. He says it makes him feel human." Lewis laughs out loud at that.

"Aye, well its a trick that every copper learns lad. Can't have an alien running around saving the city."

"Why not?"

"Because they wouldn't understand the law would they bonny lad?"

"Guess not. We can play snap again?"

 

Its nearly 6pm when Robbie decides he should take Sam home. He knows that James doesn't want them to leave, and its abundantly clear that Sam wants to stay. The little boy scowls as Robbie picks him up and he folds his arms.

"No! I don't wanna go home."

"I know you don't, but you need to eat. And sleep."

"Don't feel like home when Daddy not there." Lewis flashes a look at James, he looks ok, but his voice is rough when he speaks.

"Now Sam, you behave for Uncle Robbie." Hathaway clears his throat and continues. "When I come home, I don't want to hear that you've been naughty."  
"When is it when you're coming home?"

"I don't know Sammy."

"Soon?"

"Soon as I can." James doesn't know how to handle the conversation. He's already had it with the boy once today. It seems to satisfy the child though and he unfolds his arms to give James a hug when Lewis holds him over the bed.

"Come on bonny lad, lets go and get some grub."

 

 

As it turned out, a doctor came in only ten minutes after Robbie had left. To tell him that he could go home about midday tomorrow, on the proviso that James ate something. He hadn't been eating much in the hospital, mostly since he felt nauseous still, even three days later. But he's been told that if he can't eat, then he can't leave so he's determined to eat something tomorrow. He's getting fed up of this bloody drip anyway. He sends a text to Robbie to let him know.

 

_Allowed out tomorrow as long as I eat. About midday._

_Need us to come and get you? Do you want anything bringing?_

_If you wouldn't mind. Spare clothes and … I think that knee brace is still in the medicine box._

_No problem Jim. Knee that bad?_

_I'm just thinking about this morning, could do without that pain again. Nothing to worry about._

_If you say so lad. By the way, you're on 5mg of Prazosin if they ask tonight._

_Ah, cheers Robbie._

_Don't mention it. Sleep well mate._

 

He's just about to drop off to sleep, when his mobile buzzes. _Lewis Calling._ He answers it hurriedly, slightly worried about why Lewis has suddenly decided to call him. He soon relaxes as he recognises the voice on the other end of the line.

"Forgot to say na'night Daddy."

"Hello mate. Does Uncle Robbie know you're using his phone?"

"Yes. He said I can call you to say na'night...." The little boy goes quiet for a few seconds, before suddenly shouting. "Daddy! Unca Robbie said you coming home tomorrow."

"Yep." James can't keep the smile out of his voice.

"When I wake up?"

"No. At lunch time Sam."

"M'kay." James hears Lewis' voice and Sam sighs.

"Unca Robbie sayed that his credits is going to run out. Na'night Daddy."

"Night Sammy. Sweet dreams mate."

"I a'posed to say that to you. You the one that not has sweet dreams."

"I will tonight."

"Cos of a'medisin?"

"Yeah. Now come on, give Uncle Robbie his phone back."

"Okaaay. Na'night Daddy."

"Night night Sam, love you."

"Love you Daddy."There's a scraping sound, and then he hears Lewis' familiar Geordie tones.

"Sorry Jim, I didn't wake you did I? He wouldn't go to bed till he'd said good night to you."

"Nah, I don't mind anyway." 

"Right...well, I'll be off then, let you get some kip. I'll see you tomorrow lad."

"Yeah see you."

 

He sets the phone back down on the bedside table and grins to the empty room. He can't wait to get home to his son.

Surprisingly, he sleeps through the night, without the need for pills. The doctor smiles softly as she comes to check on him during the night, finding him soundly asleep each time, hand clutching the top of the covers.


	6. Chapter 6

Sam was beyond excited when he woke up.

"We can an' get Daddy now Unca Robbie?"

"Nah, not till lunch time Sam. He won't be ready yet."

"You not know that. Daddy might be all ready now an' he be waiting for us an' we not there an' then Daddy will be sad."

"He won't be ready yet. The doctors want him to eat first and then they need to watch him for a few hours."

"Why? A'make sure his tummy works after the poison?"

"Aye, that's right kidda."

"What if it don't work? Then what Unca Robbie?"

"I dunno kidda. He'll have to stay at the hospital a little longer."

"Is Daddy's tummy gonna work? Don't want him a'be in hostipal no more...Miss him."

"Aye, I know you do bonny lad. But its important that the doctors make sure that your Dad is fully ok before he leaves."

"Why?"

"Because if they didn't, he might get ill again. And then he'd have to go back to the hospital."

"Don't want that...I want Daddy."

"Soon lad." He gives Sam a squeeze. "We're doing alright though eh?"

"Yeah...but is not a'same without Daddy."

"I know mate, I know." Lewis wishes that he could just go and get Hathaway and bring him home. He hates seeing Sam sad like this. Not that its the child's fault, he misses his Dad which is only natural.

"When you going home Unca Robbie?" There's something about the way that question was asked that makes Robbie look at the kid.

"I don't know lad...why?" Sam chews on his thumb and Robbie can feel the hand gripping his shirt tighten. "Come on Sam, what's worrying you? I can't help you if you don't tell me can I bonny lad?" Sam shifts a little, looking down at the floor.

"What if when you gone home, Daddy gets ill again or nasty men come back and making him not be moving or other nasty men come with a gun? An' then we can't run away a'cos of Daddy's knee an' then we get captured or made dead."

"Oh Sammy," Lewis hugged the boy a little closer to him. "Your Dad will always keep you safe, whenever he can. And you know you can always call me don't you?" The little boy nods. He looks slightly happier, but Lewis senses that this isn't the end of it. Although he can't blame the boy, James _has_ nearly died twice in the space of three months. Its normal for Sam to be scared that his father will leave him forever.

 

****************************************************

 

Robbie spends most of the morning, teaching Sam to recognise 'Robbie Lewis' on a phone screen. It means he has to add himself as a contact, but that's no real bother. The kid picks it up surprisingly well and soon enough, he's getting it right eight times out of ten. And at least the half the times that he hasn't got it right, he's picked out Lyn instead, picking out the 'Lewis' part.

"Ok laddie, now you practice that, and if you ever need help, and Daddy can't help you, you call me ok?" Sam smiles and nods his head enthusiastically. He takes Robbie's phone of him and scrolls through the list, mumbling the older man's name as he goes. Lewis smiles. Its a good thing to teach the boy, you never know when something is going to happen. With James' leg looking like it might give him trouble for some considerable time, well he could have a fall and knock him self out; Sam would be left alone until he recovered...assuming James didn't hurt himself too badly. This way, the little boy knows that there is someone he can call, though it remains to be seen if Sam could actually call if he's panicking. Either way, Lewis hope that they never have to find out. He wonders why James hasn't taught him some sort of back up plan before. Lyn and Mark had been taught the number to Morse's office, just in case something happened to Val when he was at work. He remembers Mark phoning in a panic once when Lyn had gone to a friends and Val had had a migraine. Morse himself had panicked, finding himself confronted with a terrified child on the end of the phone and he'd sent a constable scurrying to find Robbie. Its only a brief thought, the treacherous one that flits through his mind. But it saddens him as soon as it does so. _Who does James have to call?_ Robbie doesn't know anything about Hathaway's life in London. He doesn't know whether the man has any close friends that he'd have trusted to look after Sam. He hopes he did. But somehow, he doubts it. His young sergeant had never been much of a social mixer.

But at least now, Sam can call him. Robbie can't bear the idea that Sam could be left in that position again, crying desperately on his own until someone comes to help.

His text alert goes off and Sam hurriedly hands the phone back to him.

_Ate food. Not dead. Allowed to leave._

Robbie chuckles as he types out a reply. That sort of shortly worded text always meant that James was fed up as a sergeant. There's no doubt that he wants to come home. Robbie stands up, and immediately, Sam copies him.

"Was that Daddy?"

"Aye, that was your Dad."

"We goin'a hostipal an' get him now?"

"Yeah. Come on, go and grab your coat." Sam needs no second bidding, careering out of the room, and running back with his coat as quick as he can.

 

****************************************************

 

When they get back to the room Hathaway has been in, they find James sat on the bed, ready to go. Apart from the fact that he's still in the cotton blue hospital clothes. But Robbie hands him is spares and he hastily goes to get changed.

 

Upon his return, he sees Sam using his phone. Before he has a chance to say anything, Lewis puts a hand on his arm.

"Its ok James, there's a point to this." Sam looks up and once he sees Hathaway, he beams.

"Daddy! Where's a'numbers on your phone? Is different to Unca Robbie's." James sits down on the bed next to him and brings up the contact list. Hathaway scrolls down the list on Sam's instruction. Lewis watches, and soon enough, Sam jabs a finger at the screen.

"That's Unca Robbie!" he says, clearly pleased with himself.

"Yeah it is, clever boy. Well done" James looks to Robbie as Sam climbs onto his lap.

"What's this all about then?"

"I figured that he should have someone to call. You said three months ago, that if something happened to you... that he'd have no one. You'll both always have me kidda. And on the off chance that something does happen, well now he's not alone." James swallows and nods, Robbie knows that he's done the right thing.

"...Thank you."

 

****************************************************

 

They get home and Hathaway perks up considerably. Lewis shakes his head; he isn't sure which one of the two boys is the most childish. At least Sam has childhood as an excuse.

James fixes them up some sandwiches (proper sausage this time), aware that Lewis is subtly checking him over. He does truly feel ok. His knee is hurting a little more than it had been a week ago, but he isn't feeling any after effects of the poison. Since eating in the hospital that morning, he's definitely got his appetite back. He's just feeling a little bit tired and he figures that Robbie can't fuss about that, he has only just got out of hospital after all. James grins at Robbie as he carries the food through to the living room. He knows that a smile, is the best way to convince Lewis that he's ok.

"Sausage sandwich?" Sam asks hopefully.

"Yep. Lots of 'em. I'm starving." Lewis smiles again, and James knows that the ex inspector is getting the message that he's doing ok. He won't be running any marathons, but apart from a little tiredness (actually, quite a bit) and a persistently dodgy knee, he really is doing ok.

 

Lewis can't help but grin as they sit and eat. James is happily chatting with Sam about whatever it is that the little boy is talking about, having clearly missed his son. Sam is overjoyed to have Hathaway back at home and he's talking ten to the dozen and very loudly.

"We can go to a'park? Wanna play football." Lewis glances at James and he can see that James doesn't want to let the boy down, but he is tired, and Robbie can see that he isn't up to it.

"Daddy's still tired bonny lad. Lets think of something less...energetic to do eh?" James looks up suddenly.

"Got it...barbecue!"

"Barbecue?"

"Yeah!" James says, all boyish excitement. "Come on, a home isn't a home till you've had a barbecue. Its a nice day and Sam can run around the garden without having to go to the park."

 

****************************************************

 

They return from the shops an hour later, laden with two disposable barbecues and copious amounts of burgers, chicken and sausages. Sam is excited and is generally running around getting in the way. James is grinning and happy and that alone is enough to make Lewis happy. His happiness is short-lived though; a phone call from Innocent soon puts paid to it.

 

"Robbie?"

"Jean, what's wrong?" He can hear in her voice that she is less than happy about something.

"Is James with you?" Lewis glances to where James and Sam are putting away the shopping, something has just made Sam laugh manically and James is smiling at him in bemused amusement. Robbie sidles out of the room.

"Not now. What's going on?"

"The man you ID'd, he's saying it was Mr Carson that put him up to it. We're going to have to arrest him. Its up to you whether you tell Hathaway. But we're going to be doing it soon. We're on our way already. 10 mins tops." She hangs up and Robbie stares at the phone. He looks up to see James pick Sam up and sit him on the work top. It seems a shame to ruin the younger man's good mood, but he knows James will want to be told.

 

"Who was that?" James asks as Lewis walks back in.

"Innocent."

"Oh? What does she want then?" Hathaway has his back to Lewis, putting things into the fridge.

"...James, I" Hathaway turns around at his tone of voice.

"What's happened?" he says and Lewis hates the resigned note to his voice.

"It appears that it was Mr Carson that poisoned you. Innocent has just gone to arrest him."

"Now?"

"Aye. That's the impression I got."

"I want to see."

"Ah kidda, you don't...not really."

"Oh I do. I want to look that bastard in the eye as he gets shoved into a car." Lewis holds his hands up.

"Hold on lad He's been accused by a bloke who is looking at serious time. He'd say anything. Ther's no concrete evidence against Mr Carson."

"He did it Robbie. I _know_ he did."

"What happened to innocent until proven guilty?"

"Sod it! I want to see him get driven off, he nearly left Sammy on his own." Lewis looks at the floor sadly.

"I'd have taken care of him Jim. You know I would."

"...Yes I know. And I'm grateful, more than you'll ever realise...But, I need to see it done Robbie. I-"

"I get it lad. But you can't do anything stupid. I know it'll be Innocent there James, but if you cause a fracas, she'll have to arrest you." James nods.

"I'll behave." Sam starts to ask questions. Reluctantly and slowly, James explains that Mr Carson 'did a very nasty thing' and the police were going to lock him up. Eventually, James has to come out and admit that it was Mr Carson who poisoned him, Sam won't let it do until he knows. Robbie doesn't think its a good idea to tell that to Sam until they are actually sure that it was Mr Carson, but he holds his peace.

 

****************************************************

 

5 minutes later and they are outside the shop. Even if they hadn't already known where it was, they could have just followed the sirens. Robbie takes hold of James' arm and they watch from a bit of a distance. Innocent must have talked to the uniforms because when they try and move on nosy spectators, Lewis, Hathaway and Sam are left alone. Sam wriggles his hand out of Robbie's and stands next to James, one hand clinging to James' trouser leg.

Its when Carson is pushed over the bonnet of the car that things start to kick off. Sam lets go of James and runs towards the officers full pelt, shouting at Mr Carson. Its hard to make out, but from the toddlers fury anyone in earshot can hear the little boy angrily proclaiming that Mr Carson is a nasty, evil man that 'try'a kill my daddy'. Innocent sees this happening, and also sees what the officers holding Carson down don't; the handcuffed man has brought a knee up. Jean has no doubt that Carson will kick the boy if he gets too close. She grabs Sam and picks him up. The child turns o look at her and promptly bursts into tears, mumbling about nasty men who hurt Daddies and men at the windows who stop people from moving.

James quietly comes up next to her and pulls the crying child out of her hands. Sam immediately buries his head in Hathaway's shoulder and wraps his hands tightly around his Dad's neck. James gently rubs his son's back, quietly soothing Sam as he stands there. Jean can see the sadness in his eyes as he does so.

"Ssshh Sammy. Its ok. Daddy's fine. Uncle Robbie is fine, and you're fine. Its ok. The nasty man is going to the police station. You're safe...I'll always keep you safe. Sssh little man, you're ok. Promise" Jean watches all the tenderness that she never thought she'd see James display and she has to admit, she's tearing up a little. Not only at the sight of the awkward young man she used to have in her team, acting so mature and so fatherly. But also at the obvious distress of the little boy in James' arms. She's saved from James noticing however, when she realises that Robbie has made a beeline for Carson. He talks to one of the uniforms and the bloody idiot stands back to let him past. The last thing Jean needs now, is an irate Robbie Lewis causing havoc. She needn't worry though, he's not about to make a spectacle of it all. He just leans in to Carson and hisses;

"I saw that, you utter bastard. He's a fucking _child_." Jean looks and sees the fear that is slowly growing in Carson's eyes. She decides that she can wait a little while longer before intervening.

"Even if it turns out that you didn't poison my mate, I hope to God that someone, someday does to you, want you were about to do to my friends son." He turns and meets Jean's eyes. She resists the urge to shiver. His eyes are like ice, while Hathaway's are like fire.

"We'll let him stew over night. And I'll talk to him tomorrow Robbie. I'll keep you posted." He nods sadly, and Jean hopes that they have something good to do today because Robbie looks fit to kill someone and James looks like the world is going to overwhelm him. Sam is still crying in his arms. She watches as Robbie walks over and takes the child, hand on James' arm. Robbie speaks and James nods limping back towards his front door, Lewis only a few steps behind. Jean shakes her head sadly, those two really need a break. There's a motherly part of her – although God knows why it applies to Robbie, he's twenty years her senior after all – that makes her stay and watch until she sees them safely inside James' house. Its a good couple of minutes before she drives away.

 

****************************************************

 

Once they get inside, Robbie hands Sam back to James. The little boy has stopped crying now and is tentatively asking James if they can have the barbecue. Its half five and so James agrees. The weather is good and they are hungry.

They get it all out of the fridge and cupboards and Lewis is sent to go and make drinks, while James starts the barbecue going.

"Don't touch that Sam Ok? Its hot and you might get burned."

"Ouch."

"Ouch, exactly. You can only go near it with me or Uncle Robbie alright?"

 

When Robbie comes back into the garden, James and Sam are starting to cook things. James is crouched on the balls of his feet behind the boy, one arm protectively holding the younger boy back from the heat. The other hand is wrapped around Sam's, guiding the little boys hand as it clutches the tongs and helping him to flip the bacon. Sam watches in fascination as the charcoal crackles and hisses, his eyes widen as a flame leaps up. Robbie hands James a beer and the man starts to pull Sam away from the disposable barbecue, eventually tempting him over with ice cold orange juice. The little boy takes a couple of sips before jumping up and running towards the swings in the corner of the garden.

"Daddy! Can you push me?" James smiles and gets up, groaning slightly as he shifts his weight onto his knee. Robbie checks that the barbecue is still cooking things nicely before heading over to join them.

"How did you get this up here from London?" Robbie asks as he tests the solidity of the swing frame.

"What? No, Some one down the road was getting rid of it. They saw me with Sam and offered it to me, cheap. Couldn't say no could I? I looked it up, do you know how much they cost in the shops? I got it at about two thirds off."

"Nice. Bargain then."

"Yeah." James says over his shoulder as he goes back to the barbecue. "Burgers are ready."

They sit eating and quickly polish off all of the food. Robbie leads Sam back into the house to wash his hands and James takes the opportunity to lie back on the grass and relax.

Its short-lived however, since the next thing he knows, there is a secretive giggle somewhere by his left ear and before he has time to react, a load of water is dropped on his face. He opens his eyes to see Sam sat on the grass next to him, giggling silently with a mischievous look in his eye. Even though his face is dripping, James can't be angry because Sam looks so happy and James just wants to shake the image of his son crying in Innocent's arms out of his head. Instead, he gets up as quickly as he can, and scoops Sam up, holding him high above his head. Sam plants his feet on James shoulders and waves to Lewis.

"Look Unca Robbie! I taller than Daddy."

"Aye, I can see that bonny lad."

"Not for long though" James mutters, as he swoops Sam down to the floor and proceeds to tickle the little boy mercilessly.

"No...not fair...Daddy...stop" Sam gasps in between peals of infectious laughter. James relents and lies on his back beside the child, as they both get their breath back. Robbie is content to sit and watch the two of them having fun, he's too old for these games anyhow. Suddenly Sam jumps up and runs into the house. James sits up and starts to help clear the debris from the barbecue away.

He gets a squirt of water in the face and he immediately realises that leaving the water guns for Sam to play with in the bath, and teaching the kid how to fill them up from the bath tap was probably not the cleverest of his ideas. He wrestles one of the water guns gently out of Sam's hand and squirts him back, initiating a fierce water fight. Robbie sits watching them, he can't help but smile at how happy James looks. It was amazing to think that one little child could make the man that happy, so easily. He shakes his head, James in any domestic situation has never felt right to him. When they were working together, he'd have laughed if anyone had said to him 'You know Robbie, one day, you'll see your sergeant having a water fight with his son in the back garden.'

 

The water fight peters out and James picks Sam up, both of them flushed and grinning...and sopping wet. At some point the bucket that James has in the garden got involved and both of them are stood there, dripping.

"Think I need'a put new clothes on Daddy."

"I think you need a bath mate."

"Why for? Jus' got covered in water, no point in a bath."

"Yeah water and mud and grass. Look at your hands." Sam does so, and then grins.

"Oh. Yeah need a bath." James puts him down on the floor.

"Come on then little man, we'll help Uncle Robbie put all this stuff away, then you can have a bath yeah?

"Yeah!"

 

While James is attempting to get Sam washed, Lewis suddenly remembers that he'd brought a present for Sam down in his bag. From him and Lyn.

_"Give it to Sam Dad."_

_"Ah Lyn, what if you have another bairn?"_

_"What if I don't? Sam'll love it Dad. Eddie's got the other one. And there are plenty of other childhood toys I can give if I have another baby."_

_"If you're sure pet...Sammy'll love it."_

_"Just explain about it Dad, tell him about Mum yeah?"_

_"'Course love. Thanks pet."_

He's a little apprehensive about it all, it has to be said. Some parents don't like other people giving stuff to their kid. He doesn't think James is such a parent, but still, its risky. In the end, he decides that he has to give the present to Sam, but he'll run it by Hathaway first.

 

****************************************************

 

He tells Hathaway (not everything. Not about Val, he's not sure if he can relate that story twice) and James smiles and tells him that its lovely and that he must thank Lyn. They agree to wait until bed time before giving the gift to the child though.

 

"Sam?"

"Yes Unca Robbie?"

"I've got something for you, but you need to promise me that you'll take good care of it."

"I will. I guard it with my life." James snorts a little and tries to hide his face. Robbie smiles and pulls a teddy bear out of his bag. Its about a foot tall, orangey fur. Its kneeling and its front paws are together as if in prayer. He hands it to Sam, and then pulls the kid onto his lap.

"Now Sam, that bear was Lyn's when she was little, when she was your age."

"When she was four?"

"Aye kidda. Her Mum made it for her. It helped her to sleep when she was scared or worried. So you have to be nice to it, because Lyn's mum is gone now and that bear means a lot to Lyn and me." James has a soft, sad smile on his face, he hadn't realised exactly how much sentimental value Robbie and his daughter had in the toy, and he's deeply touched that Lyn wanted Sam to have it.

"Where's Lyn's mum gone? Same place as my mummy?" Robbie gives him a watery smile.

"Aye bonny lad. So that bear is very, very special." Sam nods and then hugs it tightly, snuggling into Robbie a bit further.

"Thank you Unca Robbie."

"That's ok kidda. A special bear for a special boy eh?" James smiles at them both and Robbie can see the emotion in his eyes.

"Wassis name?"

"Lyn can't remember, so she said you should give it a new name. What do you think eh?" Sam holds the bear in front of him at arms length, cocking his head on one side.

"Hmmm...Fluffy!" Robbie squeezes him with one arm and smiles.

"That's a good name for a bear bonny lad."

"You sure Lyn won't mind me changin' it?"

"No bonny lad, she won't mind." James sees the film of water in Robbie's eyes and he carefully picks Sam (and Fluffy) up.

"Come on little man, bed time."

"I can bring Fluffy?" James ruffles his son's hair.

"Course you can."

 

Sam doesn't protest about going to bed, he happily gets into his pyjamas and is ready, lying on the bed, when Hathaway brings up a beaker of water.

"You can tuck me in Daddy?"

"Yeah...Sam, can you do something for me?"

"What?"

"If you wake up tonight or if you hear me awake...can you do your best not to wake Uncle Robbie up, unless you really need to. Come to me first eh?"

"Yes Daddy...but why?"

"Well, you know how Daddy was in hospital? Uncle Robbie was looking after you wasn't he?" Sam nods, waiting for James to continue.

"And he was worried about me as well, like you were. He's tired and he needs a rest alright little man? So if you need anything, then come to me first."

"Ok. P'omise."

"Good man." He tucks the covers around his son and bends to kiss him goodnight. He goes to get up, and is stopped by a little hand on his arm.  
"Fluffy needs a na'night kiss too. He sad about Lyn's mummy." James smiles and kisses the top of the toys head as well, before heading out the door.

"Night Sammy.

"Na'night Daddy"

 

****************************************************

 

James walks back in and it seems Lewis is in control of his emotions again as he smiles.

"Thank you Robbie. That means a lot. To him as well as me."

"Its nothing kidda. It was Lyn's idea." James knows that it was most definitely not nothing. His best friend has just given his son, a teddy made by his dead wife...with the blessing of said friends daughter. That is not nothing. In fact in Hathaway's limited book, that's nearly everything. But he doesn't say anything, he's not really sure what to say.

"Still, thank you. Sammy made me kiss it good night. He loves it. And I promise I'll make sure he looks after it."

"S'appreciated mate." James nods. Robbie gets up out of the chair.

Think I'm gonna go to bed Jim."

"Night." James doesn't have to listen very hard to know that Robbie stops to looks at Sam before he goes to his borrowed room

 

****************************************************

 

Sam wakes up at three am and soon decides that he can't sleep. He remembers what James said about not waking Lewis up. So he heads downstairs to the sofa bed, comfort blanket in one hand, Fluffy tucked under his arm as he holds onto the banister and makes his way down to the living room.

When he gets there, he sees that James is whimpering and shaking a little. Sam climbs onto the bed, frowning as he pokes James hard in the shoulder. When this doesn't work, he tucks the teddy bear under Hathaway's arm, and curls up on the other side of the sofa bed. He pulls the covers over himself clutching his comfort blankets and settles to watch James calm down, his thumb in his mouth. He is asleep in minutes.

 

Ten minutes later, Hathaway wakes up, backing his head away fast from the lump in front of his face. As he becomes more aware, he realises that its Sam's teddy and that the boy himself is lying a little way away from him. Realising that he must have had another nightmare, he sits up and sighs sadly. James casts a loving look over his son, before tucking the bear into Sam's arms, much like the boy had done for him.

 

When Lewis comes downstairs in the morning. He can't help but smile softly. Sam as an arm clutching Fluffy and Hathaway is cuddling Sam as they both sleep. Their foreheads are touching over the top of the soft toys ears, both of their faces buried in the fur.

Robbie gently pulls the covers back up to their shoulders where they must have shifted off. Its only half seven, so he doesn't wake them up. He wouldn't have the heart to any how. He heads to the kitchen, making himself a cup of tea. Robbie stands thre sipping it slowly, lost in memories, both good and sad. He washes the cup up and he can see through the doorway that they haven't shifted position, both of them are deeply asleep.

Robbie touches his wedding ring and mumbles quietly.

"Its still works bonny lass, the bear still works."


	7. Chapter 7

James wakes up an hour later, and Robbie grins as he nuzzles the teddy sleepily. He then appears to realise where he is and he rolls over, sitting up and stretching.

"Mornin' James."

"Mornin'...Er, What's the time?"

"S'only half eight." James nods turns to look at Sam who is still fast asleep, thumb firmly in his mouth.

"I think I was having a nightmare last night...he came and gave me the teddy while I was sleeping." Suddenly, as they sit there, Sam speaks;

"D'ddy?"

"Yeah Sammy?" There's no answer and it soon becomes clear that Sam is still asleep. The little boy's brow furrows and he whimpers quietly. Robbie looks up, and he can see that James looks stricken.

"You don't think?...Chronic-"

"-Don't jump the gun James. He's a kid, kids have bad dreams. There's no reason to think you've passed it on to him. I've done the research remember. Besides, whether he's fully aware of it or not, he's nearly lost you twice in the last three months. That's bound to have an effect on him." Hathaway looks unsure but then Sam calls out in his sleep again, and this one sounds more panicked. James gathers the little boy in his arms and gently runs his thumb over Sam's temples, quietly mumbling reassurance. It works, and Sam settles back into a peaceful sleep. Once he's sure that Sam is going to stay calm, James puts him back down on the bed and stands up.

"Breakfast?"

"Never been one to say no to breakfast Jim."

 

*********************************************************

 

Sam wakes up just as James dishes up bacon and eggs. He's none the worse for the dream he had, clearly he can't even remember it.

"Daddy!" he says, as he runs over to Hathaway, trying to climb up his father's leg, which is somewhat hampered by the fact that he's holding Fluffy in one hand. James firmly but gently stops him.

"Not while I'm carrying things Sammy eh? Tell you what, can you take this and put it on the table for me?" Hathaway could almost see Sam puff his chest out as he accepted the responsibility.

 

Robbie is sitting on the sofa, looking through an old newspaper, when he looks up to see Sam trying to push the plate of bacon onto a table that is a foot taller than him.

"Unca Robbiiee? I not tall enough. I can has help please?" Robbie chuckles and walks over, taking the plate off the little boy and safely placing it on the table.

"There you go kidda."

"Thank you Unca Robbie...We not tell Daddy?" Robbie grins.

"Nah, lets see if we can fool him eh?"

 

Of course, James has heard this exchange from the kitchen, but Sam sounds so happy at the plan that he decides to play along. He walks back in with the toast and Sam points proudly at the plate of bacon.

"Done it!"

"Well done Sam. You must have grown eh?" Sam grins and nods, looking at Robbie, who winks at him. They sit down to breakfast and Sam happily eats more than his fair share, showing that he is most definitely over his illness a few days before. After he's finished, he scrambles onto Hathaway's lap and sits there as James eats.

"You going to help me wash up eh little man?"

"Yeah!"

"Good boy. Come on, go and get the stool from the bathroom." Sam rushes off and Lewis smiles.

 

"You helped him didn't you?" Lewis chuckles in response to James' question.

"Oh aye, he's about a foot too short." They both smile as Sam comes back in, dragging the stool along with him. Robbie gets up.

"Well I'll leave you two lads to the washing up." James doesn't banter with him, he knows that Robbie is going talk to Innocent and he doesn't want to bring it up with Sam about. Instead he smiles and picks up Sam, stool and all, carrying him into the kitchen.

 

*********************************************************

 

James can't help but notice that Sam is a lot quieter that he had been before. He puzzles over it as he stands behind his son at the sink. After the last few days, he savours this chance to be close to his son, knowing that Sam won't just run off to do something else at any given moment. The little boy looks up at him as he reaches for the tap and James feels such a surge of protectiveness for the child, that it almost knocks him back.

 

Which is why its bothering him that his son seems sad about something. He doesn't want to think Sam could feel sad. When he took Sam out of Innocent's arms the day before, he'd vowed to himself, that the next person to put his son in that state wouldn't live to regret it. At first, that knowledge that he was ready to kill someone had scared him a little. But then he realised that it didn't make the feeling any weaker.

James knows that he has to handle this carefully though, Sam hasn't mentioned what's upsetting him, he doesn't seem to want to talk about it much. This mean James is going to have to be sneaky about getting the information from him.

"Sammy?"

"...Yes Daddy?"

"Where's Fluffy?"

"He's on my bed." Sam has been very good at keeping the bear out of trouble, making sure he's not putting it near anything that could potentially damage it. James knows that its making Robbie happy; seeing Sam handle the toy with such care.

"Why isn't he helping us?"

"He might get wet and hurted."

"You could put him over there," James indicates to the other side of the kitchen. "He could watch us wash up."

"No...Fluffy he's on my bed thinking."

"Oh yeah? Did he tell you what he's thinking about?" Sam nods slightly and James knows he's onto something.

"Well, is it something Daddies are allowed to know?" Another little nod. Sam has turned to face the sink and won't look at him.

"Is it something that Sam is going to tell me? You never know, I might be able to make Fluffy feel better."

"...scared about if his Daddy will leave." James sighs in his head. He notices that the kid doesn't use Fluffy as a buffer any more.

"Well, Fluffy's daddy isn't here is he?" Sam shakes his head.

"No..."

"But?"

"...But my Daddy is."

"Yes I am, and I'm not going to leave."

"You...you nearly did. Nearly went with Mummy." James doesn't need to know his son well to know that Sam is almost in tears, and he wishes he knew what the best thing to say is. Lewis would know.

"But I didn't Sam." The boy sniffs and James dries his hands, before picking Sam up and sitting him on the counter. The child stares at the floor. "Look at me Sammy. I didn't leave did I?"

"Still might. I scared."

"What are you scared of eh mate? I'm not going anywhere."

"You miss mummy?"

"Of course I do Sammy. I miss her lots."

"I scared that...scared you go in a hostipal again an' need the tube...but then you miss Mummy...an'...an'" Sam starts to cry properly now and James frowns as he picks the boy up. He can't work out where this is going, its been a long time since he was four, he can't understand how Sam thinks.

"Sssh, sssh little man. Its ok. Come on, tell Daddy what's upsetting you."

"You miss Mummy, an' you in'a hostipal with all tubes an' heart screens...and I scared you miss Mummy so much...an' you want to see her, so...so you go with her and I not see you again." That hits James like a punch in the chest. He can't stomach the thought that Sam would think that he'd rather die and be with Chrissy than look after him. Yes, he misses his wife, there's a part of him that will always be empty. But his son is everything and he'd never, ever leave him.

"No Sam," He cuddles the crying child. "I do miss mummy, but I'd never leave you like that, not on purpose. I love you, you silly little boy. I'd miss you to much to leave." Sam sniffs and tucks his head under James' chin, thumb in his mouth.

"P'omise?" James swallows. He can't promise that he's never going to die. Because he knows he will one day. But then he remembers what Lewis said to him all those weeks ago. _It doesn't matter if you can't promise it. He's too young to grasp that anyway. A white lie every now and then, its ok James._

"I promise Sam. I'm not gonna leave. Even when I really miss Mummy."

"Even when you crying?" James blinks, he hadn't realised that Sam had noticed that.

"...Yeah Sammy. Even when I miss Mummy and I'm crying...I'm still not going to leave. Alright?" he's rewarded with a small nod.

"Come on, lets go and see what Uncle Robbie's up to eh?"

 

*********************************************************

 

Lewis takes it all in with a single glance as the two Hathaway's walk into his room after James knocks. He sees the slightly haunted look in James' eyes, that he gets when things make him uncomfortable. He sees the evidence of tears on Sam, and the way the child is holding on to James' hand as if his life depended on it. He doesn't say anything though, its up to James to share it. He's a grown man, and although Lewis does feel paternal towards him, he does need to remember that James is more than capable of looking after himself. Most of the time anyway.

"Done the washing up then?" He says lightly and James looks gratefully at him for not questioning what has made Sam cry.

"Yes Unca Robbie. Fluffy is safe on a'bed and Daddy not gonna leave." Robbie takes the sentence in his stride, not displaying of the confusion that he feels, as Sam comes over to sit next to him on the bed.

"I should hope not. There's a lot of your growing he has to stick about for yet." He risks a look at James, who meets his eyes, before ducking his head and leaving the room. Sam seems unfazed by this and he continues to talk to Robbie, who is staring after James.

"Right bonny lad, this old man needs some tea, what do you think?"

"I can have tea as well?" Robbie hesitates.

"I'm not sure its a good idea for you kidda. Caffeine and little boys don't mix."

"Will it make me dead?" Robbie smiles sadly. He can see that anxiety about death is going to be a bit of a problem for James where Sam is concerned for a while.

"No, it won't kill you lad. Its just best to wait till you are a little older I think." Sam nods and Robbie gets up, letting the kid take hold of his hand. He has a nagging feeling that he should be looking for James, and trying to find out what's wrong.

 

A quick sweep of downstairs, reveals that James must be in the garden. After settling Sam on the sofa with a cup of juice and a kiddie programme (That one about the welsh fireman), and making two cups of tea, Robbie heads out to talk to his younger friend.

James is sat on the patio, back against the wall and knees drawn up. Robbie sits down next to him.

"What's wrong lad."

"Nothin'" Hathaway mumbles, as he accepts the cup of sweet tea that Lewis has handed to him. Lewis sighs. James couldn't have sounded more like a twelve year old Ken if he had tried.

"Really? So why are you hiding out here then?" James keeps quiet and trains his gaze on a fixed point directly in front of him.

"Ok, lets try something else...Why was Sam crying?" James looks down and Lewis sighs again.

"James? Look kidda, you can keep it inside you if you want, I'm not going to force you to talk. But its making you feel like shit, and at least if you talk about it, then you let some go. You know I'm right mate. Tell me now, before I go home later. Otherwise, you're going to stew on it. And I won't be able to relax, knowing that something is making you feel like this." James takes a deep breath, but he's still not ready to look at Lewis.

"...Sam...He, er...he thought that I was going to...He didn't mean it like he said it of course...but..."

"What are you trying to say kidda?" James takes another deep breath, seemingly trying to organise his thoughts.

"Sam thought, er, he thought that if I went back to hospital, that I miss Chrissy that much that I'd...I'd choose to be with her." James sniffs and rubs his forehead. "He actually thought that I'd give up on him and die to be with Chrissy."

"James, he's four, he doesn't think like you do, you have to remember that."

"But how? How can he think I'd abandon him like that?" Lewis laid a hand on James' arm, and tried not to feel offended when James flinched.

"Jim, you've got to remember that he's only four. Now I daresay that one day, he'll be as clever as you, but right now, he's four and can only think like a four year old."

"But..."

"Listen Jim. You've nearly died twice and he's been there for both times. Christ, he was on his own with you the second time James. When Chrissy died, he wasn't there was he?"

"N-no he wasn't there. Thank God he wasn't with her...if I'd have lost both of them..." Robbie doesn't doubt that it would have destroyed James. There would be no way he'd be sat here with the man if he'd lost his son as well as his wife that night. He shivers as he realises that, had that happened, James would be in prison...or dead. He doesn't dwell on the fact, that he might not have even known. Robbie carries on, determined to stop James thinking about the what if's'.

"Right. So she went out one day and didn't come back. But you, you were safe at home and he could see you, and he knew you were there."

"I guess so yeah."

"Except now, you've been home and at mine and you've been taken to hospital. Twice he's seen you need help to breathe. Now consciously, he knows your better now and he's fine. But subconsciously, he has probably realised that even home isn't safe, and you could die."

"That makes sense, but... I just...He thought I'd leave..he-"

"-He doesn't realise that you wouldn't have a choice Jim. He doesn't see death like we do." James nods slowly and Robbie thinks he may have got through to the younger man.

"I wish he never had to see it again. I'm going to leave him some day aren't I, I can't live forever." The younger man shudders a little as he hugs himself a little tighter.

"Is it selfish that I want to die first Robbie?" Lewis squeezes James shoulder. He understands completely. The need for James to have Sam outlive him, because the alternative is too much for the young man to even try and contemplate. He doesn't understand why James is thinking about it though. He's healthy (apart from his knee, but still, for a man that's been in Intensive Care twice in the last 90 days, he's pretty healthy), and there's no indication he needs to be thinking about his mortality. But Robbie knows that there's no point trying to tell this to Hathaway. So he just keeps his hand on James' shoulder, trying to offer some form of reassurance, even though he's not even sure what he's trying to reassure him about.

"No bonny lad, its not selfish at all." James breathes in deeply and blinks, shifting against the wall. "Now, come on lad. Lets go inside eh? Sam will wonder where we've got to." They head inside and James goes to the bathroom to wash his face while Robbie makes another cup of tea for them both.

 

When he comes back in, James is sat on the sofa and Sam has climbed up to stand on his thighs. Sam plants his feet on James knees and grabs his hands as he leans back as far as he can, laughing as he does so. James is grinning, and although there's still sadness in his eyes, Lewis can see he's sorting his head out. Sam falls forward onto James' front and Hathaway cuddles him. He pulls Sam down so he's cradling him as he would a baby. Sam smiles and snuggles into him. Once he's settled, Sam grabs hold of his hand and fiddles with it as James slumps further in his seat, and finally lets himself relax. After a while, he looks up at Lewis and the soft smile on his face diminishes, but doesn't disappear.

"What did Innocent say?" Back to business then. Lewis isn't sure if that's really a good thing or not.

"She's going to come over later, tells us what they know."

"She's interviewed Carson then?"

"Aye. Sounds like it."

"Right." He pauses. "Did she say what was going to happen to him?"

"No. I think she probably wants to discuss it with you."

"That sounds suspiciously like 'He's not going down'."

"I'm sure it isn't James. And if it is, you know Jean will be supportive and she'll know other ways to get him."

James nods. For all the shouting and disapproving glances that he endured as a sergeant, he knew Jean to be a supportive boss. He found that out when he'd gone to talk to her about Simon Monkford. Despite not actually giving him any specific orders, which she could have, she helped him to reach a decision on his own. And although that decision hadn't exactly given him the outcome he wanted, it had given him one he needed.

He looks down to see tat Sam has grabbed hold of one of his hands properly and has pulled it to his head, using it as a pillow. Or possibly a comfort blanket, James isn't really sure. He rests his head on the sofa and watches as his son trying to see if he can make James' hand into a fist.

 

It isn't long before Lewis looks up to see that Sam and James are both asleep. He decides to leave them there, instead going to make some sort of lunch for when Jean arrives in a little while.

 

*********************************************************

 

James jerks awake 30 minutes later, and Lewis smiles at him.

"I was just about to wake you up, Jean will be here in ten minutes. Good timing." He kicks himself as he remembers where he's seen that movement in the younger man before. He lowers his voice and speaks softly.

"Bad one this time lad?"

"Had worse. No one died? I think I should be taking Prazosin again."

"You haven't been? Ja-mes!"

"Forgot...I'll take it tonight. Promise." Lewis raises his eyebrow as Sam shifts in James' arms.

"Robbie, I will."

"Ok. I'm gonna hold you to that you know."

"Yes Dad." Suddenly, there's a quiet mumble from James' arms as Sam opens his eyes.

"...Tol' you Daddy. Unca Robbie not a daddy. He'a unca. An' he not your daddy any way." James smiles down at Sam as he rubs his eyes and sits up. "...is he?"

"Nope. You've never met my Dad Sammy. He died before you were born."

"You miss him?"

"Not particularly." Sam frowns and Lewis steps in here, aware that this conversation is probably not a good one to continue. Clearly, just woken up James, doesn't have his ability to censor things for kids. Lewis has no illusions about the fact that James Hathaway's father was a bastard. But even if James was to ever tell him why, now is not the time for that conversation, not with the man's infant son in the room.

"Sam, why don't you go and play eh lad? Let me and your Dad sort out lunch."

 

*********************************************************

 

Fifteen minutes later and Jean, James Robbie and Sam are sat around the dining table, tucking into pasta with tomato sauce. Robbie is proud of it, considering it doesn't taste half bad and he cooked it in an unfamiliar kitchen. Not to mention the fact he had to find half the utensils in boxes.

"You made this Robbie?" Jean says, giving James a sidelong glance. He ducks his head, smirking.

"Aye" Robbie frowns. "You needn't sound so surprised Jean."

James stifled a snort and Robbie hit him playfully on the arm. Suddenly Sam, who has been quiet since Jean arrived, pipes up.

"Unca Robbie's pasta is nice. You a policemanlady, you should be able a'tell from a'tection skills."

"Ah, thank you lad." Robbie ruffles Sam's hair before turning to James. "Did I ever tell you that your son has impeccable taste?"

"Robbie, you are so easy to please." Jean says, before looking down at where Sam is tugging at her sleeve.

"Wassit like a'be a policemanlady? You have to chase nasty men?"

"Not as such Sam."

"No, she sent poor sod's like me and yer Dad after them." Robbie muttered and James can't help but chuckle.

"Then what you do? Just write at the desk all day. That's boring police job." James decides enough is enough and stands up.

"Stop asking so many questions Sam, let Jean eat her lunch." Sam scowls before clambering onto James' lap and looking up at him.

"You chased nasty men Daddy?"

"Yep, me and Uncle Robbie chased lots of nasty men. All over Oxford."

"What they did so you had to chase them?"

"All sorts of bad things Sam."

"Did you punch them? And put them in'a handcuff and say 'you nicked'"

"Er, not exactly."

"But you 'rested lots of nasty men." Robbie breaks in.

"Aye that we did lad, and nasty women." Sam's eyes widen.

"What nasty women? What they did?" James and Robbie exchange a look and James' eyes clearly say _don't give him any details_. Luckily, Jean cuts in.

"This is starting to sound like an interrogation Sam, we should be asking the questions. What do you want to be when you grow up eh?"

"Fireman Sam!" The little boy beams. James smiles and looks up at Robbie.

"Well, seems we've gone past the painter phase then." Sam starts to babble on about how he'd be safer because there would be no nasty men to attack him, only nice people that he has to save from the fire. None of the adults have the heart to point out to him that fire is just as dangerous. Hathaway isn't sure how happy he is with this new idea. He wants his son to go into a safer job. And this doesn't look like its going to be a fleeting obsession either.

"Are you sure Sam? It'll be very dark." His son gives him a pitying look, which Robbie finds hilarious

"No it not dark Daddy. There be a fire. Lights everything up. An' then I have a torch for when the fire is gone." James gives up. He'll just have to home that Sam grows out of this idea.

"Well, how about you go and play now Sam? We have to talk."

"Adult talk again."

"Yeah." Sam frowns, climbing off Hathaway's lap.

"Borin'" he mutters as he wanders out of the kitchen. They soon hear the crash as Sam tips the Lego box upside down.

 

*********************************************************

 

Its about ten minutes later that Jean starts to talk about Carson's interrogation. It comes to light, that the ram raid was an insurance scam and Carson hired the man with the spider tattoo (Who was named Chris Parks), to carry it out.

Once it had become clear that Parks would be identified, Carson had given instructions to the man to 'persuade' the witnesses not to testify.

"So why did Mr Holton end up dead?"

"When we interveiwed Parks, he said that Mr Holton had refused point blank to be persuaded and there had been a fight, n which Mr Holton had been killed."

"Well what about me then?" James demanded angrily.

"He knew you were once a cop. And he knew he had to get rid of you after you went to the police station. For some reason, he didn't think Robbie had given evidence. He didn't see him there. He got Parks to drop the bottle round, and hoped you drank it."

"I was a bloody idiot." He looks at Jean. "Level with me then, what'g going to happen to him...and this other man, Parks"

"Well Parks is going to go down for manslaughter at the very least, but the intent was there, so he might get done for murder."

"And Carson?"

"Conspiracy to murder and fraud spring to mind. He'll be gone for a good long while James."

"Good. Bastard deserves it. He will get put away won't he?"

"Its up to a jury to decide. But he's confessed and both he and Parks have testified against each other. It is very likely."

"Deserves everything he gets."

"Aye, bloody bastard" Lewis mutters with feeling.

 

*********************************************************

 

Innocent leaves shortly after, telling James to watch his leg and look after Sam. James agrees to and waves her off, grateful that she isn't aware that he's wearing the knee brace under his trousers. He'd end up with a lecture about taking it easy and going back to the hospital.

 

Its clear that James has fully recovered from the effects of the poison. Robbie informs him that he's leaving tomorrow and James doesn't panic inwardly like he did before. Instead, James suggests that they should watch a film or something that night, with junk food. Robbie agrees, and while he packs to go home in the morning, James and Sam head to a DVD rental shop. Much to Robbie's delight, they grab fish and chips on the way home.

 

So it is, that at half past six that evening, Robbie on one end of the sofa, and Sam and James are curled up on the sofa, in front of _The Iron Giant_. Truth be told, if James had known that there was going to be an in depth discussion about death, he probably wouldn't have showed it to Sam. But the little boy seemed ok, and seemed to have fallen in love with the eponymous giant. Even Robbie had to admit that its a good little film in its own right

"Daddy?"

"Yeah?"

"If there was a giant like that one in Osfud...where we could hide it?" James smiles at his son's mispronunciation of the town he lives in.

"In Wytham woods. That's a big place Sammy."

"But is there metal there? Giant needs'a eat. He can't eat trees."

"I don't know mate. We'll have to think about that when we find him won't we?"

"Yeah...We need'a go to the scrap piles...that's where he be's hidin'." Sam twists on the sofa. "Unca Robbie? Is there a scrap place in Osfud?"

"I'm not sure bonny lad." Sam goes quiet and continues to watch the film, chuckling at the Giant's attempts to dive into the lake.

 

About twenty minutes later Sam announces that he is now a Iron Giant and his chips are lumps of metal. When James tries to tell him that potato is very different to metal; Sam tells him, matter o'factly, that if they were made of potato they would make him ill. The little boy then insists on James eating one of his chips, so that he can see. Hathaway plays along, and eventually Robbie gets coerced into eating a 'metal chip'. He swears that James was the driving force behind it as well.

 

The end of the film is less entertaining as it upsets Sam despite the happy ending, and it takes a cuddle from James, while wrapped in his comfort blanket, to console him.

 

Sam stays cuddled there as Robbie reads him a story, tracing his finger over the letters on James' t-shirt. He doesn't need to see the book, its a Thomas the Tank Engine one that he knows off by heart.

James smiles as he sees his son's eyelids start to droop and Robbie is soon smiling too as Sam wriggles into James' chest. Its soon apparent that the child is asleep.

Lewis gets up wordlessly, heading into the kitchen. He returns a minute later with a glass of water and the box of Prazosin. Once he's sure that James is taking the medication, he picks Sam up and heads upstairs with him.

 

The little boy half awakens as Robbie lies him down on the bed and grabs Lewis' hand as he pulls away.

"N'go"

"Sssh now kidda, go to sleep." Sam relinquishes his grip on Robbie's hand, in favour for sticking his thumb in his mouth.

"N'night" Sam mumbles sleepily. "L've you Unca R'bbie" Robbie smiles softly.

"Feeling's mutual bonny lad." He turns to see James in the door frame, smiling. Hathaway crosses over to the bed and gently kisses his son's forehead.

"Night Night little man, sweet dreams eh." Sam sighs in his sleep and turns over.

 

After James assures Robbie that he can finish the rest of the decorating himself, its only really painting after all, they make moves to go to bed. But not after Lewis has once again insisted that he help James get the sofa bed ready.

"Cheers"

"No problem, anyway, you should be watching it with that knee."

"No I mean...Cheers for everything. For the past...for looking after Sam...for...just cheers." Robbie nods. He knows what James is trying to get across.

"Anytime kidda...anytime." Robbie squeezes James shoulder and then goes upstairs, aware that he needs to leave tomorrow and should be rested if he's going to drive, even just the short distance home.

 

James lies on the sofa bed, contemplating the last week and all the feeling associated with it. The over riding image though, the one that he can't get out of his head, is one of the most recent. Sam curled on his lap, while Robbie reads him a story. Falling asleep in James' side and telling his best friend that he loves him.

 

James realises that he finally feels safe and happy in his own house. Finally feels like he can cope with the hole in his heart left behind when Chrissy died.

 

For the first time in a year and three months, James Hathaway falls asleep with a smile on his face.


End file.
